My Grandma grew-up in a very Mormon household and was married by the time She was 18yrs. old. She has been married to my Grandpa for 60yrs. Most of that time they have adhered to most of the strict beliefs that the church demanded of them. However, my Grandpa smoked behind the churches back and kept a bottle of whisky in the bedside table for medicinal purposes only.(sometimes Grandma drove him crazy) They both never drank their whole life and still don't but Grandpa would take a swig every now and then if He were stressed enough. Nothing wrong with that but I have to say that the grandchildren like to get a rise out of my sweet Grandma every-now-and-then because she is still so innocent. This weekend Pop and I bought a movie thinking that the old folk don't get out much so to entertain ourselves and to spend some quality time with them we could all watch a movie.
Along came Polly sounded innocent enough, not according to my Grandma. Keep in mind she watched the whole movie even when I had my eyes closed some of the time; I even cringed at times because I just thought it would be way to scandalous for her. I didn't want to give her a heart attach or cause her blood sugar to rise at a deadly level. Hey they are old and Grandpa threatens to die on us all the time usually to milk all the attention he can get especially from Grandma (he agrees with this).
After the movie ended Grandma said, a woman married 60 yrs. never see a naked rear end, especially not a young naked butt! I think she was trying to give me a heart attack. My jaw dropped. She smiled and Grandpa stayed up with her whilst we went to bed. Grandpa sleeps in their room and she sleeps on the couch, but I'm thinking Grandma might have gotten a little fresh with Grandpa. Maybe he even got to pull his nasal cannula from his oxygen tank to the side for a little kiss action.
*Please note that while this is a true story mostly, my family has a wonderful sense of humor and this is to be taken lightly. They found it funny and know my sense of humor. No one was offended by this post and if you are I'm sorry you take life too seriously.
Happy New Year...another year and many more post to come I hope a glimpse in my life of that darn girl can bring you a little piece of happiness ;)
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Friday, December 19, 2008
I can't believe it I am turning into my Ma...
A Pic of Ma and my sister... Ma's DogI woke up this morning at 4:00 am looked into the mirror and Screamed...
I am starting to look like my Ma and not only that I have turned into her too..
My Ma had a pill for everything.
You have a cold, put some vics in your nose and take a B vitamin...
You have an ear infection, put some vics and take a B vitamin...
You have upset stomach, put some vics and peptobismo...
My version (my poor child he has a neurotic mother that is a nurse)..
Kid did you poop today...He says," Ma" No...
No worries I got a pill..here take this stool softener...
Kid how many times did you pee today and what color was it...(the kid doesn't drink enough water so I am neurotic and think he will die of dehydration) The kid says, "Ma" 2 times and it was yellow...Me "all day" OMGOsh...I got water with crystal light lemonade in it...drink up...
What you have a huge pimple... I got a tube of anit-pimple cream let me pick it and put some vic up your nose...
It's tragic...It can't be...I said I would never turn into her...
At least I don't walk around with a shirt in the house that is slit all the way down both sides sos she can torture my sister & I or anyone that we might bring to the house...
She's obsessed with showing off her great boobs..
I would never be like that...
I mean really does it sound like me to talk about my boobs and show them off?? Really?
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Engineer guys 31ar birthday bash...
Out to dinner with Engineer guy, his brother and girlfriend. We made them sing Happy birthday to him and then we went to the comedy club to see last comic standing winner Alonzo Bodden..
He was a trooper and happily mentioned Engineer guy's birthday to the crowd.
One day at a time...
Happy Holidays to all...
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
And these are the days of my life..
Whilst being at stay at home goddess (no job yet but I am working on it) I have been trying to be exciting seems like my days are dull compared to what they used to be like. Good thing I have great friends that just happen to live crazy lives and then share them with me.
read on and be wowed...
udes
So the smooth kitty kronicals are in full swing, First of all It is amazing that i made it here! Ran 2 freaking Miles (felt like 10) with my 40lb backpack on arriving at my connecting flight in Atlanta, GA as they were closing the gate! So looking like a wet dog! Oh sexy girlfriend! yea. So my kitesurf gear obviously did not make it but I did yea! Thank god, I had my first date set up for Thursday night! I slept all day until 6 pm the time change was and still is a bitch! 8 hour difference. from Maui, I want to sleep all day and party all night, he he...
I finally dragged my ass out of bed and went for a walk around the neighborhood and went shopping for food. Made it back to hostel in time for a shower and realized that it was almost 930 pm shit the sun was still up it's summer duh! My date, er I mean first victim... Juli picked me up at my hostel and we went to some bar called liquid! Got drunk (shocker I know) and some random guy grabbed my ass Juli defending my honor (ha ha) I know he did not know me yet! Got in a fight and we all got kicked out of the club at 2:30am damn time flys!
read on and be wowed...
udes
So the smooth kitty kronicals are in full swing, First of all It is amazing that i made it here! Ran 2 freaking Miles (felt like 10) with my 40lb backpack on arriving at my connecting flight in Atlanta, GA as they were closing the gate! So looking like a wet dog! Oh sexy girlfriend! yea. So my kitesurf gear obviously did not make it but I did yea! Thank god, I had my first date set up for Thursday night! I slept all day until 6 pm the time change was and still is a bitch! 8 hour difference. from Maui, I want to sleep all day and party all night, he he...
I finally dragged my ass out of bed and went for a walk around the neighborhood and went shopping for food. Made it back to hostel in time for a shower and realized that it was almost 930 pm shit the sun was still up it's summer duh! My date, er I mean first victim... Juli picked me up at my hostel and we went to some bar called liquid! Got drunk (shocker I know) and some random guy grabbed my ass Juli defending my honor (ha ha) I know he did not know me yet! Got in a fight and we all got kicked out of the club at 2:30am damn time flys!
Got invited ok should I say Sexnapped back to his apt I was thinking I should play hard to get, then logic and reason went out the window when he started kissing me and holding his hot did I say hot, fucking ripped body against me! Plus, his cologne I think it is called wet panties in English! Damn yea so score is USA 2 ARG 0, only 24 hrs in he he. I am here for a good time not a long time right. Ok so he lied, he said he would give me a ride home In the am ha ha! I think that is the first time I have done the walk of shame in buenos aires ha ha. At least the hostel was close, only a few blocks from his place. I Could not care had fun he was hung and has a beautiful body, so sexy nice juicy uncut cock. I swear the more research I do, I am never going back to uncut men.. It seriously takes off at least an inch or more, idiots, I think I will start a cause against circumsizing penis.. Poor guys...
I went for a run in the park Sat and realized how grateful I am to be here and be able to have the lifestyle I have. Freedom is the most amazing gift you can have. The ability and choice to do what ever you want where ever you when ever you want. YES! I jogged past to lovers in the park making out, here it is ok and accepted to have public display of affection I love that no shame here. I jogged past them over an hour later and they were still at it. Love this city. Also the technology still stuck in the past a bit here, A small girl was roller skateing on a pair of old, i mean old skates, like they were metal with the straps to tie to your shoes. Think way way back, before inline skates. She was so happy rocking out with her rollerskates. Makes me appreciate all the freaking toys I have, typing out emails on my goddamn phone, how do you say spoiled! Yes I spoil myself why because no one else is going to! fuck it only live once enjoy it every day.. Go big... I also love how much attention I get here. I feel like I am naked all the time. All the men look when me a white blond girl runs by.. freaking so awesome for the ego, especial since I was feeling like matilda the hunt in Maui. No love dry spell from hell, I swear I felt fat and ugly there and I know I was hella active. At least here the men have egos so big here they are not threatened by me.. hehe How does an Argentine man kill himself, he jumps off his ego.. he he
How do you say next, oh yes his name is Diego my new baby daddy, he he and I am going to meet him and his family tomorrow! What the fuck Day 2 first date with him and his family, RED FLAGS ANYONE? Oh then pablo (no I AM not seeing him again, he wants me and he can not have me na na na na) but he got me into the world polo finals tomorrow afternoon my out worse case! Yea so all is well! I am happy safe and unwound! Happy kitty meow..Woo hoo
Ok update now day 5 Monday, opps I lost track of time fast here, shit. So Date with Diego was umm interesting. If your ok with meeting the parents who do not speak english and your spanglish which sucks ass, well it was quite the experience. One for the books I can now say I met the parents on a first date, bizzare.. But Diego, is well hot, amazing body, built like a rugby player, huge and wide, and he hem hung, I swear I really really tryed to not have sex on the first date but hell since he wants to have my kid. I figured I should see what I would be dealing with, Yea Argentina 1 USA 3.. Ok I smiled all day took all the damn questions ( like, do I cook? Could I be faithful? he he how old am I, Why am I still single? Hell I dont know? What am I doing for Christmas, do I want to spend it with him and his family, do I want to move in with him and stay at his apt. HELLO, I just met this guy except for brief chats online.. Is your mouth hanging open, yea mine too) and drilling with a grain of salt. But when he asked me for my papers I could not help but laugh,... Seriously, the funny part was he was dead serious. My clean bill of health.. Ok I know I have a twisted sense of humor but damn. Imagine you just met the most beautiful man and he says I would like to imagine having a child with you, your skin, your eyes are so beautiful, you have such a great body. Oh by the way are you HIV neg or pos HELLO SCREEEECH... Brakes, where the hell is the exit, I was like yea I am clean what about you? did you say hepatitis? What? was that a joke, Oh you have a pacemaker and your 38 and your biological clock is ticking louder than mine. more like a landmine.. wow.... So how was your day? Heavy or lighter than mine? Any way went and watched fireworks in downdown and stayed at his very nice apt and tryed not to sleep with him but he decided to sleep naked next to me, mary penis torcher chamber. ahh yea so you know me, woke up at 330 am with a gianormous shlong next to me and I accidentally fell on it trying to get up and use the bathroom missed the bidet.. oopss my bad.
I figure that is the best way not to get a second date here in Argentina, as the men have no respect for women who put out on the first date. And since I have no respect for men (they all lie to or say anything to fuck) I think we are even. So I am sure I will not hear from him again. we will see I will keep you updated. I think He is OCD. Overthinker for sure. Way heavy machismo, man looking for his mom to take care of him and raise a family.. He he Yea sign me up, but he said he wants to go to tahiti with me we will see if that is bull shit, are you seeing the same kind of a trend as me here. The men talk all sweet and when they open there mouth its all bullshit.. sounds good smells like shit.
At least he had a beautiful cock to back up the shit and his thighs and body linebacker, I was MIA underneath him...... he he Next...
Ok so Sunday, A day of rest for me, and today I walked all over the damn city trying to figure out where I could launch my kitesurfing gear and realized how freaking spoiled I was in Maui.. here the water is so gross I am getting sick already and I have not even touched. it I took some pictures I will post on the blog, since that is public you can see the trash in the soup that looks like chocolate poop water. eeeuuuuu
Love your mugs, hope this first bit of crazy smooth kitty vag chronicals brightens your day. More to come, I am lining up dates with Fernando for seconds from last time I was here, yummie hotel by the hour adventure. And with Sebastian the hottie singer. Can not wait to see him perform. Maybe a personal performance after show show... Also looking forward to the Stripper, also have a clingon at the end of the world in Ushuaia Diego no. 2... And German in Rodeo to go kitesurfing with. Should be an interesting week(month) lets see who wants to go home with Mary???, Since I can not take a spanish class this week, the damn school I signed up with went out of business since um 4 months ago.. WTF??? Well at least Aunt flo decided to wait a few days before benching smooth kitty for an involuntary time out...
MEOWWWWW
XO
Crazy
Crazy
Thursday, December 04, 2008
Finding the funny...
Today I was talking to a friend on the phone that makes me crack up..
We love to talk about our families...
His eating pigeon during the depression (he will only admit to his grandparents eating it) and mine eating squirrel (what can I say they are from the country)
So, I asked him how work was last night and then he told the story...
It goes something like this..
He was a work (he has a history of being very clumsy) a trait that I think builds his character...
He was suppose to be wearing black dress pants for serving people...
Well I guess he always goes commando and happen to bend down and catch his pant pocket to the corner of the bar....as you may guess he tore the pocket down to the zipper and his balls fell out...
I am assuming that his whole package fell out but he spared me the dirty little details...
Turns out his boss is some what of a Hitler type so He made him put on Yellow rain rubber pants to serve the rest of the night....
I cracked up laughing at the thought of him ripping his pants while serving drinks to people at a baseball game...they got a little more than they bargained for..
I hope he at least shaved....
We love to talk about our families...
His eating pigeon during the depression (he will only admit to his grandparents eating it) and mine eating squirrel (what can I say they are from the country)
So, I asked him how work was last night and then he told the story...
It goes something like this..
He was a work (he has a history of being very clumsy) a trait that I think builds his character...
He was suppose to be wearing black dress pants for serving people...
Well I guess he always goes commando and happen to bend down and catch his pant pocket to the corner of the bar....as you may guess he tore the pocket down to the zipper and his balls fell out...
I am assuming that his whole package fell out but he spared me the dirty little details...
Turns out his boss is some what of a Hitler type so He made him put on Yellow rain rubber pants to serve the rest of the night....
I cracked up laughing at the thought of him ripping his pants while serving drinks to people at a baseball game...they got a little more than they bargained for..
I hope he at least shaved....
Tuesday, December 02, 2008
The signs are there you just have to see them...
Whilst working hard at not having a job today I came upon a blog that was sales driven. It stated, "The signs are all there you just have to see them" . I am looking for signs that will point me in the right direction to finding the job that is right for me...
Well I must be blind because I don't see any signs right now...
I looked under the covers...
I looked under the bed...
I asked the people I live with if they have seen any signs..
I looked in my car...
Nope Nothing I got nothing...
No worries I will continue to search for that dang sign but it is tiring let me tell ya!
Well I must be blind because I don't see any signs right now...
I looked under the covers...
I looked under the bed...
I asked the people I live with if they have seen any signs..
I looked in my car...
Nope Nothing I got nothing...
No worries I will continue to search for that dang sign but it is tiring let me tell ya!
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Will I ever get it right??
I'm on a mission now this is not any mission it is like FBI style...
Seriously, I know you all can keep a secret I am a former agent of sorts..
Now I can't tell you what agency I worked for because then I would compromise my famliy..
But...it was serious
Think like Borne Ultimatum...Jason Borne but I'm a girl...
I'm on a mission to find love and the body I had last year...
So, like anything in my life I am taking it balls to the wall..
I need a plan that is what I need...
for this plan I must like figure out what it is that I want from a man?
I would like just the basics that every other woman wants..
Friendship...
Lots of affection...
and well that about sums it up..
well there is more I know but since I haven't had either of these is a very long time they are the ones that come to mind...
as for the work out and body I am working on it daily...
I even did handstands today now that it commitment...
More on scoring later and that former agency that I worked for...
Seriously, I know you all can keep a secret I am a former agent of sorts..
Now I can't tell you what agency I worked for because then I would compromise my famliy..
But...it was serious
Think like Borne Ultimatum...Jason Borne but I'm a girl...
I'm on a mission to find love and the body I had last year...
So, like anything in my life I am taking it balls to the wall..
I need a plan that is what I need...
for this plan I must like figure out what it is that I want from a man?
I would like just the basics that every other woman wants..
Friendship...
Lots of affection...
and well that about sums it up..
well there is more I know but since I haven't had either of these is a very long time they are the ones that come to mind...
as for the work out and body I am working on it daily...
I even did handstands today now that it commitment...
More on scoring later and that former agency that I worked for...
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Happy Holidays...What am I thankful for...
Happy Holidays all...
I will get back to my research for blogging later. For now I would like to say the things that I am thankful for even though this has been a very hard year for me. I say good riddens to 2008.
I am thankful for...
2009 and new beginnings...
I am thankful for my friends that have loved me even if...
I am thankful for a child that is amazing...
I am thankful for all of my blogger friends that help me keep my fame in my mind...
I am thankful for food on the table and for a father that believes in me no matter what...
I am thankful that I have a good relationship with my sister no matter how many fights we have gotten into over the years..We still love each other no matter what..
I am thankful that my brother-in-law came back from Iraq safe and sound. He made it though OCS yeah!!!
Monday, November 24, 2008
Research number 2...
Since I am not working at this time I have decided that I need to do research just like real writers..
When Engineer guy's roommate left to live with his soon to be wife he left his playboys...So I heard that that playboy has interesting editorials, but mostly I saw boobage and vagignass... Now I asked myself what is normal? hair or no hair??Then I asked myself how much sex is normal a week when you are in a monogamous relationship?? Once a week? twice a week or 3 times a week?? I don't know you tell me??
When Engineer guy's roommate left to live with his soon to be wife he left his playboys...So I heard that that playboy has interesting editorials, but mostly I saw boobage and vagignass... Now I asked myself what is normal? hair or no hair??Then I asked myself how much sex is normal a week when you are in a monogamous relationship?? Once a week? twice a week or 3 times a week?? I don't know you tell me??
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Research.....
Research in the name of love...
I have always been the girl to go to when having relationship problems. Why my friends think that I am worthy I have no idea??... especially since I am not about feelings when it comes to my own relationships. It seems that everyone is having relationship problems not only my girlfriends, but my guy friends as well. Let's take for instance Millionaire Parents guy...Now this guy is 25 yrs old, he is a paramedic firefighter and Captain of his crew. He is the the youngest Captain in the valley of the sun, and he is a loyal friend. His parents are millionaires but he is not snobby in the least and a very generous, kind , funny smart guy, so why can't he find love in the valley? He calls me to tell me about his resent break-up seems that the girl that he was dating and living with after only 7 months has a jealousy problem? Hu?? Seems that this girl is jealous of his past relationships? Run that by me again? She's jealous of your last girlfriend that you had before you knew her because you went on a cruise to Alaska? How is that even possible??She tells him that she doesn't like it when he hangs out with the gang at bars...Hu? What is wrong with her I wonder?? Here is this guy, wonderful sure he has some issues...He's not perfect but he is a great person...He asks me what I think?? Oh yeah right like I am the person to be asking relationship advise because I am so good at them right?? Well I can say that I wasn't jealous of Engineer guy's past girlfriends..Now I don't think it is healthy to talk about past possible loves, but there is no use in being jealous of something that was. He asks me what I loved so much about Engineer guy??Great he wants to talk about feelings...I tell him I knew that I would love him and he would love me that night he had me over to his house for dinner and ummmm dessert. It is hard to explain chemistry...it just is and well I am a hard nut to crack. Chemistry is difficult to find, I am very passionate about him. He is very smart, analytical and mathematical... things that I couldn't even fathom he is capable of. So, I guess opposites attract, I am la la girl boobs out at the parties we attended whilst he stood in the back round and allowed me to receive the thunder...I am very passionate about medicine...I live it, I breath it, and I am very passionate about my friendships. I guess that when two people love each other as much as I love Engineer guy you want to hold on to the very last thread, and I am not a quitter. It seems that for a while we were playing for different football teams...he for West Virgina and I for SMU...I told Millionaire parents guy that we only have one life...and life is way to precious to short to give up on love. What I have with Engineer guy is magical and what I love about him is simply him. We have to write our own stories, now that story can be one of love, friendship, amazing sex & intimacy with hope, loyalty and beauty a beauty that I have never felt before or it can be pessimistic. I choose beauty, so relationships are works in progress. With great love can be great pain but if it is worth it the pay off can be so rewarding. Now I know that I have been very cheesy in this blog but sometimes you just have to get it out. Jeff...She's out there you'll find her and when you do it won't be perfect but it will be beautiful...
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
And these are the days of my life...
Now that I have your attention. I felt like looking a a ball today so I pulled this pic out of my personal stash. Now I wish that this ball was shaven because I really can only appreciate balls that are smooth but beggars can't be choosers.
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
On my way home alive
I'm on my way home...
check it with you later stay tuned to see pics of the first wives club and hear the tatered stories of my travel!!!
check it with you later stay tuned to see pics of the first wives club and hear the tatered stories of my travel!!!
Monday, November 17, 2008
Sorry for my absents...
After almost dieing from a GI bleed last week I think I have an ulcer. Go figure I would die from a GI bleed and not something more dramatic like gun shot wound. Needless to say I had to see the Dr. when I was with my high school friend that I haven't seen for 17 years... and and admit that the Dr. indeed violated me and put his finger in my tail. At least I got some pain medicine. The last time I was violated by my GYNO at the tender age of 23 yrs. old I asked my Ma is that normal for the GYNO to put his finger in my tail and she said yes...I saw no benefit from this and He didn't even offer me a shot of tequila. What kind of freaky stuff she is accustom to... I don't know because when I was older and asked my GYNO if this was normal during a paps smear HE stated and I quote, " I generally only use that tech for my geriatric patients" WHAT? Violated...With KY jelly at only 23. Not surprising that I know many different uses for KY jelly than the intended use.
If I ever felt like an old lady it is right now. I have been drinking down Milanta and eating Pilosec. Now there has to be something wrong with that picture. Hopefully it is just H-pilor that I might of picked up from Mexico since I find myself a worldly traveler since I have still not gotten a Job...Oh it is in the works...I'm intently looking for a sexologist job right now I know it is right the coroner i can feel it...No pun intended!
If I ever felt like an old lady it is right now. I have been drinking down Milanta and eating Pilosec. Now there has to be something wrong with that picture. Hopefully it is just H-pilor that I might of picked up from Mexico since I find myself a worldly traveler since I have still not gotten a Job...Oh it is in the works...I'm intently looking for a sexologist job right now I know it is right the coroner i can feel it...No pun intended!
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Saturday, November 08, 2008
My New Job...
Whilst watching the boob tube the other day I noticed a job that I thought I'm a nurse I could totally do that. Being a nurse could be part of my credentials plus like I could like get a couple of written statements with signatures from the past Loves of my life "at the time Guy".
Sexologist...
It is not what your thinking...
It would be helping couples gain a better sense of intimacy...
and I would tell the wife to definitely flash boobage way more..
I got tons of Ideas..
It will be like I am always the brides maid and never the bride..
but tons of funnnnn!!
Sexologist...
It is not what your thinking...
It would be helping couples gain a better sense of intimacy...
and I would tell the wife to definitely flash boobage way more..
I got tons of Ideas..
It will be like I am always the brides maid and never the bride..
but tons of funnnnn!!
Thursday, November 06, 2008
Hey I am sending you all a shout out from San Diego. I have been letting the wind blow through my hair, eating all the bad food that I can get my hands on. Whilst walking though the San Diego Zoo I was reminded that last week I was trying so hard to make sure I worked out that I actually fell asleep on the elliptical. I know I was kind of in shock too but let me tell you what muscle memory can do for you. You can actually fall asleep with your feet and legs still moving. I thought I might call Guinness world record to see if anyone has attempted that fate. Let me know if you have a clue. Guinness here I come!!
Saturday, November 01, 2008
In the name of love..
Because I am famous in my mind I thought it appropriate to reveal some know or unknown facts about myself therefor sealing my fate as a famous person if it only in my mind.
1. My left big toe nail fell off. Due to my running the trails at a speed of a snail. My toenail bruised and then proceeded to pull away from me.
2. I am traumatized by my big toe nail situation. I only pulled the last of it off the other day and I have worn sock ever since to hide my ugly toe. I can't even get a pedicure and that is almost against the law.
3. Sometimes I obsess about the wrinkles that might appear on my forehead. I try and not wrinkle my eyes because I want to keep that fresh look about me. Aging is not a process that I am taking a liking to.
4. No secrete to thoughts that no me I think my boobs are my best physical feature and a source of many of my blog writings.
5. To my greatest fear I have become a lot like my mother. My mother has a pill for everything. So, I have a pill for everything. I take every know vitamin known to man. Got gas I got Beanno. Constipated I have fiber pills. Still constipated I got gloves and JY jelly for lubing you up. I have plenty of practice since I have been working as a nurse. Got heart burn I got zantac. Got nausea I got phenergan. Have asthma I have an albuterol inhaler.... and so on and so forth.
6. I can never shut off the nurse in me. Stub your toe I will baby you for comfort.
7. My family thinks sending me naked pictures of old women and men is funny. Why just this morning my cousin "big muscle guy" sent me a text wishing me a happy Halloween with an old naked woman. What I don't get is that this woman actually let someone take a picture of her. Maybe she wanted to be noticed for her wrinkled up body. Boobs deflated something to look forward to.
8. I am directionally challenged I get lost even with directions in front of me. I think that it is genetic.
9. My hair is my nemisis and it has been every color on the wheel. At times it has turned against me for coloring it so much.
10. I live by the Catholic girl code, if I don't remember it never happen.
11. In the name love I often have to suck it up and take one for the team. That includes putting myself in uncomfortable and unfamilar places for the people that I love. I know I am a marder. Usually there is nothing that I wouldn't do for my friends and that includes sticking my fingers into places for the sake of my hipocratic oath that I took the very day I became a nurse.
sincerely
Darn girl
1. My left big toe nail fell off. Due to my running the trails at a speed of a snail. My toenail bruised and then proceeded to pull away from me.
2. I am traumatized by my big toe nail situation. I only pulled the last of it off the other day and I have worn sock ever since to hide my ugly toe. I can't even get a pedicure and that is almost against the law.
3. Sometimes I obsess about the wrinkles that might appear on my forehead. I try and not wrinkle my eyes because I want to keep that fresh look about me. Aging is not a process that I am taking a liking to.
4. No secrete to thoughts that no me I think my boobs are my best physical feature and a source of many of my blog writings.
5. To my greatest fear I have become a lot like my mother. My mother has a pill for everything. So, I have a pill for everything. I take every know vitamin known to man. Got gas I got Beanno. Constipated I have fiber pills. Still constipated I got gloves and JY jelly for lubing you up. I have plenty of practice since I have been working as a nurse. Got heart burn I got zantac. Got nausea I got phenergan. Have asthma I have an albuterol inhaler.... and so on and so forth.
6. I can never shut off the nurse in me. Stub your toe I will baby you for comfort.
7. My family thinks sending me naked pictures of old women and men is funny. Why just this morning my cousin "big muscle guy" sent me a text wishing me a happy Halloween with an old naked woman. What I don't get is that this woman actually let someone take a picture of her. Maybe she wanted to be noticed for her wrinkled up body. Boobs deflated something to look forward to.
8. I am directionally challenged I get lost even with directions in front of me. I think that it is genetic.
9. My hair is my nemisis and it has been every color on the wheel. At times it has turned against me for coloring it so much.
10. I live by the Catholic girl code, if I don't remember it never happen.
11. In the name love I often have to suck it up and take one for the team. That includes putting myself in uncomfortable and unfamilar places for the people that I love. I know I am a marder. Usually there is nothing that I wouldn't do for my friends and that includes sticking my fingers into places for the sake of my hipocratic oath that I took the very day I became a nurse.
sincerely
Darn girl
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Today I present the funnies...
I just thought that I needed a laugh today. I hope you find some comic relief as I need it as well and what more do I find funny that to talk about sex!!
Sunday, October 26, 2008
With much power comes an even great responsibility...
With much power comes an even greater responsibility...
Isn't amazing that in this whole wide world I would find a common bond with people that write the most intimate details of their lives... whether that be about the cigarette that they lit after an amazing session of 5 hour sex or the day that there child graduated from kindergarten. It seems that a force greater than the power of being finds bloggers that understand your triumphs as well as your failures. It seems that they are there to pick you up when you need a loving hand or smile at your constant stories of boob flashing to make yourself feel better. Over the past 2 and a half years I have shared my first time of having sexual intercourse (doesn't that sound sterile?)How about sexual chocolate ( I think I like that better) (Father I swear that last statement was only for story interest so not true)Moving on to the time that I had to leave Paramedic guy due to his ingression's. It seems that I have found people that really understand me even though we share only the Internet. I am writing about this because I have been inspired by one of my blogger friends. Now I like to give credit where credit is due and we all have situations that inspire us to write after all isn't that what it is all about?? Inspiration
I would like to quote something that hits me down to the very electrical force that hits the AV node of my heart. I would like to publicly thank him for helping me see some light to my darkest days and remember what it is that makes my heart tick. And I quote "
Isn't amazing that in this whole wide world I would find a common bond with people that write the most intimate details of their lives... whether that be about the cigarette that they lit after an amazing session of 5 hour sex or the day that there child graduated from kindergarten. It seems that a force greater than the power of being finds bloggers that understand your triumphs as well as your failures. It seems that they are there to pick you up when you need a loving hand or smile at your constant stories of boob flashing to make yourself feel better. Over the past 2 and a half years I have shared my first time of having sexual intercourse (doesn't that sound sterile?)How about sexual chocolate ( I think I like that better) (Father I swear that last statement was only for story interest so not true)Moving on to the time that I had to leave Paramedic guy due to his ingression's. It seems that I have found people that really understand me even though we share only the Internet. I am writing about this because I have been inspired by one of my blogger friends. Now I like to give credit where credit is due and we all have situations that inspire us to write after all isn't that what it is all about?? Inspiration
I would like to quote something that hits me down to the very electrical force that hits the AV node of my heart. I would like to publicly thank him for helping me see some light to my darkest days and remember what it is that makes my heart tick. And I quote "
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Can I please call a 1-900 number to help me get over my grief?
I am still over come by grief and loss of Engineer guy. I don't Know how I let myself get to this far. I have tried thinking of ways to get over the constant sadness that racks havoc in my heart.
I thought that I might find a group of women and men that might be able to help me fill the space in my heart. Maybe I should start a 1-900 broken heart line to help me pay my bills and mend my heart.
Got any other ideas?
I have tried to take a bath...
No help
I have tried wine
Not the answer
I tried working out only good for my butt did not thank me..
No ease at all
I called my high sch0ol girlfriend
She was wonderful to catch up with my heart still hurts
I have immersed myself into the private and shady life of one of my girlfriends. I was at court with her all day during her divorce proceeding it got kind of nasty...
It only helped for a bit..
I tried to read all of the funny blogs that I Love to follow..
I couldn't think of any witty comments...no help
I tried wine again
Still didn't help
I showed my boobs to my girlfriend, my girlfriend's sister and her Mother. I even showed my nipples. Hey this is an emergency I had to pull out all the my tricks out of the bag.
It helped a little to have them fondled and to be told that they were nice, but that only lasted as long as one night. It helped enough for me to go onto Oprah and suggest that his might be a good way to cure the blues for at least an hour or too.
I took another shower, put on some make-up did my hair and when to target to play that old game of look at me and give me some attention.
It worked for a minute until I thought that the only attention I was getting was from the old me that were there either buying tampons or walking behind their wife's. Hey I am moral I thought that they should have waited to look until they were their on their own accord.
What is a girl to do?
I even tried to watch " Legends of the Falls" even Tristan couldn't help me...
Don't get crazy if here were here in person on my behalf and lets just say all my clothes fell off I might think that oh who am I kidding I know it would work. Tristan please come to me... where are you Tristan when I need you the most?
I thought that I might find a group of women and men that might be able to help me fill the space in my heart. Maybe I should start a 1-900 broken heart line to help me pay my bills and mend my heart.
Got any other ideas?
I have tried to take a bath...
No help
I have tried wine
Not the answer
I tried working out only good for my butt did not thank me..
No ease at all
I called my high sch0ol girlfriend
She was wonderful to catch up with my heart still hurts
I have immersed myself into the private and shady life of one of my girlfriends. I was at court with her all day during her divorce proceeding it got kind of nasty...
It only helped for a bit..
I tried to read all of the funny blogs that I Love to follow..
I couldn't think of any witty comments...no help
I tried wine again
Still didn't help
I showed my boobs to my girlfriend, my girlfriend's sister and her Mother. I even showed my nipples. Hey this is an emergency I had to pull out all the my tricks out of the bag.
It helped a little to have them fondled and to be told that they were nice, but that only lasted as long as one night. It helped enough for me to go onto Oprah and suggest that his might be a good way to cure the blues for at least an hour or too.
I took another shower, put on some make-up did my hair and when to target to play that old game of look at me and give me some attention.
It worked for a minute until I thought that the only attention I was getting was from the old me that were there either buying tampons or walking behind their wife's. Hey I am moral I thought that they should have waited to look until they were their on their own accord.
What is a girl to do?
I even tried to watch " Legends of the Falls" even Tristan couldn't help me...
Don't get crazy if here were here in person on my behalf and lets just say all my clothes fell off I might think that oh who am I kidding I know it would work. Tristan please come to me... where are you Tristan when I need you the most?
Saturday, October 18, 2008
Letting it all hang out!!!
Yes it is Saturday night and I am home like a dork. What can I say my girls are on vacation and didn't feel like coming out to be party favors.
I am in the devolopemental stages of starting my business. Where there is a will there is a way and I am guilty of watching Oprah. This week on Oprah there were women that when they couldn't find a job theryt started their own business, and I am no different. I am excited to start something that can go a long way. Hell I have nothing to lose if you know what I mean.
I used to thing that saving lives in the ER was the end all of who I was. I infact only identified myself by being not just any nurse but a ER nurse. I know that I sound stuck on myself but it took me ten years to finish my BSN and a lot of sleepless nights. The world was against me all of my friends at the time never thought that I would actually make it though nursing school. I guess I only rise to the occation if I am challenged. The truth was that a little of me died each time I would got to work and see something so horrific I would not even want to tell all of you just to spare your hearts. I thought that I could handle it if I sucked it up if I were strong. The truth is that what I did would effect anyone that walked in my shoes. The problem was is that I really cared way too much giving way to much of myself not ever holding back. I lost a bit of my sole in the last 3 yrs worrying about thoughts that take life for granted.
I am thinking about writing a book about my experiences like the time this male came into the ER with a urinary tract infection. He was about 21 yrs old. Men that young don't get UTI's unless it is gondaloria and chymidia. Anywho I went into his room to give him 4 zythromicyn pills and a shot of Rocephin (the cure) and he was all hugged with with his girlfriend. He asked me why I was giving him a shot and I told him because you have gondaloria why else do you think that you are pissing FIRE. He looked straight into my eyes and stated Nurse I don't have an STD and if I do it's this BITCH (pointing to his hugged up girlfriend) fault. I said I am not here to judge you. he almost beat me up until Dr. Goldenrod rushed to my rescue.
And you wonder what is wrong with me???
I am in the devolopemental stages of starting my business. Where there is a will there is a way and I am guilty of watching Oprah. This week on Oprah there were women that when they couldn't find a job theryt started their own business, and I am no different. I am excited to start something that can go a long way. Hell I have nothing to lose if you know what I mean.
I used to thing that saving lives in the ER was the end all of who I was. I infact only identified myself by being not just any nurse but a ER nurse. I know that I sound stuck on myself but it took me ten years to finish my BSN and a lot of sleepless nights. The world was against me all of my friends at the time never thought that I would actually make it though nursing school. I guess I only rise to the occation if I am challenged. The truth was that a little of me died each time I would got to work and see something so horrific I would not even want to tell all of you just to spare your hearts. I thought that I could handle it if I sucked it up if I were strong. The truth is that what I did would effect anyone that walked in my shoes. The problem was is that I really cared way too much giving way to much of myself not ever holding back. I lost a bit of my sole in the last 3 yrs worrying about thoughts that take life for granted.
I am thinking about writing a book about my experiences like the time this male came into the ER with a urinary tract infection. He was about 21 yrs old. Men that young don't get UTI's unless it is gondaloria and chymidia. Anywho I went into his room to give him 4 zythromicyn pills and a shot of Rocephin (the cure) and he was all hugged with with his girlfriend. He asked me why I was giving him a shot and I told him because you have gondaloria why else do you think that you are pissing FIRE. He looked straight into my eyes and stated Nurse I don't have an STD and if I do it's this BITCH (pointing to his hugged up girlfriend) fault. I said I am not here to judge you. he almost beat me up until Dr. Goldenrod rushed to my rescue.
And you wonder what is wrong with me???
Friday, October 17, 2008
They say that with great pain in the heart a famous love song is derived
They say that with great pain in the heart a famous love song is derived...
Although I am not much of a country song writer or even a love song writer...
Even if I am the cockroach of love...and one time I pulled a cockroach out a a little kids ear and porque there were eggs...gross I know I couldn't help myself. It was Walker inspired.
I feel like everything has a rhyme and a reason for happening and well since my heart and pocket book are on the brinks of breaking I feel as if I have to go for broke and roll the dice mostly in Vegas where all the bling bling is...No I am not moving to Vegas but you must be asking yourself what in the H-E-L-L is darn girl talking about. There is a reason for these statements just like there must have been a reason that I had to see two 18 G needles (yikes bigggg) bilaterally placed on a Peni to drain the blood...This is kind of a Public awareness statement. Some psyco drugs can cause prioprism (an erection lasting more than 4 hours can cause ED forever) I suggest after the 2nd hour to go to the ED...
That is not really the reason I was talking about everything happens for a reason. Tonight I got a call from a kid who had sales written all over my phone, for the 50 Th time I said I don't need a nursing Jobber why would I use a recruiter? Hello Nursing is like the easiest job to get...more later about why that is the truthful statement...He says to me taking all my sh@# talk (he's from the Boston area and now he is famous in blog land). He's going to talk with his people and I might just have another business opportunity boiling in the pot...Let's be hopeful I really need a pedicure...
Although I am not much of a country song writer or even a love song writer...
Even if I am the cockroach of love...and one time I pulled a cockroach out a a little kids ear and porque there were eggs...gross I know I couldn't help myself. It was Walker inspired.
I feel like everything has a rhyme and a reason for happening and well since my heart and pocket book are on the brinks of breaking I feel as if I have to go for broke and roll the dice mostly in Vegas where all the bling bling is...No I am not moving to Vegas but you must be asking yourself what in the H-E-L-L is darn girl talking about. There is a reason for these statements just like there must have been a reason that I had to see two 18 G needles (yikes bigggg) bilaterally placed on a Peni to drain the blood...This is kind of a Public awareness statement. Some psyco drugs can cause prioprism (an erection lasting more than 4 hours can cause ED forever) I suggest after the 2nd hour to go to the ED...
That is not really the reason I was talking about everything happens for a reason. Tonight I got a call from a kid who had sales written all over my phone, for the 50 Th time I said I don't need a nursing Jobber why would I use a recruiter? Hello Nursing is like the easiest job to get...more later about why that is the truthful statement...He says to me taking all my sh@# talk (he's from the Boston area and now he is famous in blog land). He's going to talk with his people and I might just have another business opportunity boiling in the pot...Let's be hopeful I really need a pedicure...
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Calling all bloggers for some advice...
Dear Bloggers...
I am asking for some advice? I want to know what is it that pushed you to be successful..
Now in saying successful I don't necessarily mean financial success but how did you become successful in what you deem success to be..
Success to me is: Having a family that loves you..
Success is that one big sale that you just closed.
Success is being a stay at home mother..
Success is having a partner that loves you in spite of it all..
Success is having a good job..
so on an so forth...
Tell me what inspires you all..
Thank you
And to all my Canadian Friends Happy Thanksgiving
I am asking for some advice? I want to know what is it that pushed you to be successful..
Now in saying successful I don't necessarily mean financial success but how did you become successful in what you deem success to be..
Success to me is: Having a family that loves you..
Success is that one big sale that you just closed.
Success is being a stay at home mother..
Success is having a partner that loves you in spite of it all..
Success is having a good job..
so on an so forth...
Tell me what inspires you all..
Thank you
And to all my Canadian Friends Happy Thanksgiving
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Starting to see the light again..
Although my life is falling to pieces right in front of of me I have to say that I have just now started to see the light of day. Life isn't all that bad, and I really have great friends even if I am homeless with no job and no money. I can't let it get me down. I must move on to dream bigger dreams and believe that they will come true. I have rounded up my girlfriends to help me get through the pain of not having Engineer guy to warm up against me at night.
I know it might sound silly to think that I will be a millionaire one day but I think I am. Wasn't it Eleanor Roosevelt that stated, " The beauty belongs to thoughts that believe in their dreams". That very quote got me through some of the toughest times in nursing school when the professors told me to packet it up and go home that I would never graduate and that I would never pass boards. Ahhh victory never smelled so sweet...
So, now instead of spending my days dealing with poo and crotch rot I am looking to start a business with my very talented girlfriend. If I don't fail then how can I succeed. Even though my heart is broken in a million pieces I must go on...
I know it might sound silly to think that I will be a millionaire one day but I think I am. Wasn't it Eleanor Roosevelt that stated, " The beauty belongs to thoughts that believe in their dreams". That very quote got me through some of the toughest times in nursing school when the professors told me to packet it up and go home that I would never graduate and that I would never pass boards. Ahhh victory never smelled so sweet...
So, now instead of spending my days dealing with poo and crotch rot I am looking to start a business with my very talented girlfriend. If I don't fail then how can I succeed. Even though my heart is broken in a million pieces I must go on...
Saturday, October 11, 2008
Hanging by the chinny chin chin of my Hair....
I have been lost...
And it is definitely cloudy, sometimes it is even a tear storm, but My son has given me a lot of love during this time and distraction. We have made Brochures with stickers---I know something I liked to do as a girl. He was just proud of it because I tried to make it look original and 3D.
I have to say that I have this amazing girlfriend who has stood by me though thick and thin. This is the kind of woman that you only get to meet once in a life time and no matter what crazy sh#@ you might have put her though she is alway there to listen despite her own hurt. Wow of all the people in this world that I could have met it happened to be her. Her heart shins so bright it is amazing that she is not a movie star or something.
Through my pain, I have inlisted her into trying to start a new business with me. I'll keep you posted on it. The say that sometimes the best things come out of pain...you know like hit songs.
Mariha Carries "Butterfly" ...Maybe I am still in the cocoon waiting to get out...I mean really I could be writing all these times from a cocoon...no knowing it only to find out that I in deed have big boobs and big beautiful wings....
Days are looking a little brighter...
They can't destroy me, I willl never never give up for I am the cockroach of love...
Well I am off to the library to research...but I will return to follow up on all my Peeps..I owe you all so much again thank you!!!
And it is definitely cloudy, sometimes it is even a tear storm, but My son has given me a lot of love during this time and distraction. We have made Brochures with stickers---I know something I liked to do as a girl. He was just proud of it because I tried to make it look original and 3D.
I have to say that I have this amazing girlfriend who has stood by me though thick and thin. This is the kind of woman that you only get to meet once in a life time and no matter what crazy sh#@ you might have put her though she is alway there to listen despite her own hurt. Wow of all the people in this world that I could have met it happened to be her. Her heart shins so bright it is amazing that she is not a movie star or something.
Through my pain, I have inlisted her into trying to start a new business with me. I'll keep you posted on it. The say that sometimes the best things come out of pain...you know like hit songs.
Mariha Carries "Butterfly" ...Maybe I am still in the cocoon waiting to get out...I mean really I could be writing all these times from a cocoon...no knowing it only to find out that I in deed have big boobs and big beautiful wings....
Days are looking a little brighter...
They can't destroy me, I willl never never give up for I am the cockroach of love...
Well I am off to the library to research...but I will return to follow up on all my Peeps..I owe you all so much again thank you!!!
Tuesday, October 07, 2008
You showed me love....
This is a tribute to my blogger friends...
Oh all ye faithful, joyful and triumphal oh come ye to blogger er land...
I would like to thank all of thoughts that have stuck by my though laughter and threw my tears...If it not have been for the kindness that you have showed me and you know who you are Walker, super.. I might not be here today...
I think I am going to write a book on the love...Holy crap I can't make it without him...Oh yes you can guide...I mean who better to write it than the darn girl herself as she speaks about how to over come the nagging and pulling on your heart strings...
Why do I care? I often used to tell my patients that our heart is a live it feels...It is electric...
and now I can feel their hopeless, their pain damn it all why do I give a shit?? What is wrong with me??
I have to say that I did it, I lost myself. I have made plenty of mistakes over the past year that would test any ones love and I don't blame Engineer guy at all for letting go...
So, I ask myself what is the lesson I must learn this time? Be thankful for the love that you have been given. Be thankful for the gifts that God has given you...I still strive for greatness even though I have fallen short. I have truly been blessed with a gifted child that will serve as someone who breaks down the stereotypical thoughts of interracial people. This kid is so beautiful inside he makes you have to have hope for our government. He transcends onto greatness and I am not just saying that because he is my son...I am so truly blessed to have someone as beautiful in my life. I think it was me that needed him more than he needed me as he tries and shelter me from my pain I know that he feels my sadness no matter how much I try and conceal it. unfortunately he has the curse like I do and can feel the pain and sadness of others. He is truly special and if I never do anything else he will have been worth all the pain that I have gone though to make things right for him. I was lost with out being his mommy and I hope to go back to the virtuous woman that I was so that he can stand up and be proud of his mommy.
No fear bloggers for I have a plan in order that I might save lives again. That the work that I do will have meaning and purpose far and greater than it has ever been. An ohd' to the blogger friends that have stuck by me though thick and thin...I might not always be worthy but I will be the last one to hang on for dear life...supporting you all no matter what. I have been known for being crazy but is that really all a bad thing. I accept people for the good the bad and the ugly and my love will never waver. So blogger friends I say till the end of the ocean till the very last grain of sand I will be behind you no matter what you do on the Ferris wheel at the county fair!!
Oh all ye faithful, joyful and triumphal oh come ye to blogger er land...
I would like to thank all of thoughts that have stuck by my though laughter and threw my tears...If it not have been for the kindness that you have showed me and you know who you are Walker, super.. I might not be here today...
I think I am going to write a book on the love...Holy crap I can't make it without him...Oh yes you can guide...I mean who better to write it than the darn girl herself as she speaks about how to over come the nagging and pulling on your heart strings...
Why do I care? I often used to tell my patients that our heart is a live it feels...It is electric...
and now I can feel their hopeless, their pain damn it all why do I give a shit?? What is wrong with me??
I have to say that I did it, I lost myself. I have made plenty of mistakes over the past year that would test any ones love and I don't blame Engineer guy at all for letting go...
So, I ask myself what is the lesson I must learn this time? Be thankful for the love that you have been given. Be thankful for the gifts that God has given you...I still strive for greatness even though I have fallen short. I have truly been blessed with a gifted child that will serve as someone who breaks down the stereotypical thoughts of interracial people. This kid is so beautiful inside he makes you have to have hope for our government. He transcends onto greatness and I am not just saying that because he is my son...I am so truly blessed to have someone as beautiful in my life. I think it was me that needed him more than he needed me as he tries and shelter me from my pain I know that he feels my sadness no matter how much I try and conceal it. unfortunately he has the curse like I do and can feel the pain and sadness of others. He is truly special and if I never do anything else he will have been worth all the pain that I have gone though to make things right for him. I was lost with out being his mommy and I hope to go back to the virtuous woman that I was so that he can stand up and be proud of his mommy.
No fear bloggers for I have a plan in order that I might save lives again. That the work that I do will have meaning and purpose far and greater than it has ever been. An ohd' to the blogger friends that have stuck by me though thick and thin...I might not always be worthy but I will be the last one to hang on for dear life...supporting you all no matter what. I have been known for being crazy but is that really all a bad thing. I accept people for the good the bad and the ugly and my love will never waver. So blogger friends I say till the end of the ocean till the very last grain of sand I will be behind you no matter what you do on the Ferris wheel at the county fair!!
Monday, October 06, 2008
How to pretend that you are successful in relationships...
One must believe the best...
Now I know that we have all been in the dump...in the dumper when we have broken and had our heart broken in a million peaces in the name of love.
I'm not sure but I think wine is (preferably the whole bottle of wine) is the answer...
I think Dr. Goldenrod told me once that wine was the answer to all of our problems...He was smart I should write that down take notes if you will...
I sort of talked with Engineer guy today via the cold, stone way by of the lap top and via e-mail...
It brakes my heart to know that I have hurt him so much...He never of coarse tells me that but I can feel it one of those pesky little things that come with being a nurse...Damn why me I ask?why me??..
Maybe wine (the whole bottle is the answer?)
It was like yesterday that I was writ ting about how I froze his penis at our best girls house and now I am trebling cold without the warmth of his naked body against mine...I am challenged by God to crucify the flesh...
Saving lives was one of the things I did that I took for Granted...with much power comes way more respect....and little of me has died...
More wine is needed to cure the pain...
Okay really...I know that I sound really pathetic right now...and why shouldn't I? I just walked out on a man that I though and knew that I would be spending the rest of my life with...having more children with...I have not given up hope yet....I will never given up on what was meant to be and I can keep on encouraging "thoughts who do believe in the beauty of their dreams..." Elenore Roosevelt...
I am hoping that Engineer guy will see the dept of my beauty and love for an innocent child who needs me more now that ever...it is not noble to do what is right...what is right is right and what is wrong is wrong...my moral compass steers me to do what it's right no matter the torment that it has on my soul....As much as I have loved and been so lucky to have the people that have loved me in this life...I have not love anyone as much as I have loved Engineer guy and the kid...The kid however is still very much a child that needs encouragement and strength from his mother and I can just hope that Engineer guy can see that my intentions are good even if I make inrush decisions I mean well...and I still think of engineer guy as family no matte what the coming days bring me...
All of my blogger friends out there pray for strength and for tolerance that my heart maybe able to take this separation from Engineer guy,....and hopefully he will come around and see that the kid and I are the only ones for him...if not I am prepared to accept defeat and move on if need be...
I told myself that this would be a funny post...you know where I talk about my boobs or ...I talk about the old guy with the pump erection devise displayed for all the nurses to see under the white tent...
I am breathing so I guess I will make it...but a big piece of me is estava gone for now...
The kid and me send our love your way so that you may live in some kind of peace...as for me...thankgooodness that I am famous in blogger land or else...
Banding together for a common cause...
Now I know that we have all been in the dump...in the dumper when we have broken and had our heart broken in a million peaces in the name of love.
I'm not sure but I think wine is (preferably the whole bottle of wine) is the answer...
I think Dr. Goldenrod told me once that wine was the answer to all of our problems...He was smart I should write that down take notes if you will...
I sort of talked with Engineer guy today via the cold, stone way by of the lap top and via e-mail...
It brakes my heart to know that I have hurt him so much...He never of coarse tells me that but I can feel it one of those pesky little things that come with being a nurse...Damn why me I ask?why me??..
Maybe wine (the whole bottle is the answer?)
It was like yesterday that I was writ ting about how I froze his penis at our best girls house and now I am trebling cold without the warmth of his naked body against mine...I am challenged by God to crucify the flesh...
Saving lives was one of the things I did that I took for Granted...with much power comes way more respect....and little of me has died...
More wine is needed to cure the pain...
Okay really...I know that I sound really pathetic right now...and why shouldn't I? I just walked out on a man that I though and knew that I would be spending the rest of my life with...having more children with...I have not given up hope yet....I will never given up on what was meant to be and I can keep on encouraging "thoughts who do believe in the beauty of their dreams..." Elenore Roosevelt...
I am hoping that Engineer guy will see the dept of my beauty and love for an innocent child who needs me more now that ever...it is not noble to do what is right...what is right is right and what is wrong is wrong...my moral compass steers me to do what it's right no matter the torment that it has on my soul....As much as I have loved and been so lucky to have the people that have loved me in this life...I have not love anyone as much as I have loved Engineer guy and the kid...The kid however is still very much a child that needs encouragement and strength from his mother and I can just hope that Engineer guy can see that my intentions are good even if I make inrush decisions I mean well...and I still think of engineer guy as family no matte what the coming days bring me...
All of my blogger friends out there pray for strength and for tolerance that my heart maybe able to take this separation from Engineer guy,....and hopefully he will come around and see that the kid and I are the only ones for him...if not I am prepared to accept defeat and move on if need be...
I told myself that this would be a funny post...you know where I talk about my boobs or ...I talk about the old guy with the pump erection devise displayed for all the nurses to see under the white tent...
I am breathing so I guess I will make it...but a big piece of me is estava gone for now...
The kid and me send our love your way so that you may live in some kind of peace...as for me...thankgooodness that I am famous in blogger land or else...
Banding together for a common cause...
Sunday, October 05, 2008
Bending over...pulling my boot straps up!!!!
Calling all friends out of the darkness into the light I am going to have to lean on you until I feel better...
Each day I pick up my huge son I know in the deep depths of my heart that I did the right thing.. However...each day I know that I am away from everything I have know for the last five years...
It matters not because I can pull myself up from the boot straps ..as I have done in the past as I will do again...
So, I have assembled the people that I need to surround myself with...you know who you are I have called you this week together because there needs to be an intervention...
Staci: you have known me since I was 15 yrs. old. I ask you to keep me close that that I may express the feelings that you know that I have...that I might turn this baren time into productive mode...
K...keep intouch we have much to talk about and things to accomplish...
Thanks Bev for underestanding when no one else could...
Untill tommorrow...
Each day I pick up my huge son I know in the deep depths of my heart that I did the right thing.. However...each day I know that I am away from everything I have know for the last five years...
It matters not because I can pull myself up from the boot straps ..as I have done in the past as I will do again...
So, I have assembled the people that I need to surround myself with...you know who you are I have called you this week together because there needs to be an intervention...
Staci: you have known me since I was 15 yrs. old. I ask you to keep me close that that I may express the feelings that you know that I have...that I might turn this baren time into productive mode...
K...keep intouch we have much to talk about and things to accomplish...
Thanks Bev for underestanding when no one else could...
Untill tommorrow...
Saturday, October 04, 2008
Friday, October 03, 2008
Man down I repeat Man down
Sorry I haven't been by in a while but my heart is just broken right now..
Most of you know that I left the sand to move closer to my son the right things to do..
Engineer guy stayed behind and I don't think will be joining me. My heart is broken in to a million peices, it seems that when I try and do something right I just get it all wrong??
I once told him that I would love him till the deepest end of the ocean till the very last grain of sand and I ment that..
Engineer guy I still love you...
Most of you know that I left the sand to move closer to my son the right things to do..
Engineer guy stayed behind and I don't think will be joining me. My heart is broken in to a million peices, it seems that when I try and do something right I just get it all wrong??
I once told him that I would love him till the deepest end of the ocean till the very last grain of sand and I ment that..
Engineer guy I still love you...
Sunday, September 28, 2008
finding that right jobber....
I know that I have quit my job at time when people are I think about to jump out of buildings...
What the hell I have come up with some ingnous way to at least eat...
I could stand at the gas station corner and flash my boobs to the on lookers,
but 1. I think I might cause more accidents then getting cash..
2. I think that is against the law unless you are in phx and going down the float and looking for more beer...ask me How I know this all I can say is Sister we have enough beer quit flashing alright will ya.
then I thought I could sand on the corner with a bathing suit on, but then I thought I might get busted by the cops for solicitation....for what being a model and trying to make it in "Hollywood"? We all know that being a professional model takes time.
So Career, moster and any old person that is willing to take my resume I have been sending it out like a wild woman. It is just this time I would not like to have to put my fingers in places the sun doesn't shine ....how about pharmaceutical rep. I know my drugs (lord knows I have given all different kinds of med but never killed anyone so I think that's a good thing right?) All I have to do is get the Dr. to spend 5 mins with me flash my boobs and voila, we have a sale. I got it all figured out I tell you...wish me luck.
still away from home and although I am with my kiddo matters of the heart are never easy to fix.
What the hell I have come up with some ingnous way to at least eat...
I could stand at the gas station corner and flash my boobs to the on lookers,
but 1. I think I might cause more accidents then getting cash..
2. I think that is against the law unless you are in phx and going down the float and looking for more beer...ask me How I know this all I can say is Sister we have enough beer quit flashing alright will ya.
then I thought I could sand on the corner with a bathing suit on, but then I thought I might get busted by the cops for solicitation....for what being a model and trying to make it in "Hollywood"? We all know that being a professional model takes time.
So Career, moster and any old person that is willing to take my resume I have been sending it out like a wild woman. It is just this time I would not like to have to put my fingers in places the sun doesn't shine ....how about pharmaceutical rep. I know my drugs (lord knows I have given all different kinds of med but never killed anyone so I think that's a good thing right?) All I have to do is get the Dr. to spend 5 mins with me flash my boobs and voila, we have a sale. I got it all figured out I tell you...wish me luck.
still away from home and although I am with my kiddo matters of the heart are never easy to fix.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
two sticks,. glue =, a peice of gum and watch Magiver at work
I took my son fishing this weekend and all he caught we 3 tiny little bity fish...
Of coarse I made him clean them and cook them on a camp fire that I made him start with a flint..
While I was not looking his grandfather gave him some matches so they could finally start the fire. Hey at least I didn't give him two sticks rub together or we would have been there all night.
Of coarse I made him clean them and cook them on a camp fire that I made him start with a flint..
While I was not looking his grandfather gave him some matches so they could finally start the fire. Hey at least I didn't give him two sticks rub together or we would have been there all night.
Saturday, September 20, 2008
Declaration of independence....
I know whilst most of you are worried about loosing your jobs and wondering what the future is going to bring and all of a sudden I run away...
Let the true be know that whilst in nursing school they didn't tell me that women would sometimes have claspers in their vaggigna area (usually found on male sharks). Imagine to my dismay of only finding this out after school and whilst having to insert a foley cathater. I have not been the same since.
I also happen to leave Engineer guy behind. He is a good man and I am very sad but he was just not ready for the family life like I was, and you can't fault the man for not really wanting to start a family with me....I'm a little crazy at times but I am always about the love. I still want to have children and he was not ready for that with me. I totally understand, no hard feelings. So if you know any Ice islanders out there(that speak no English I prefer) that happen to be really tall, fit with ice blue eyes and a really nice body.... and is dumber than the average tool in the shead will you keep me posted.
Untill then I am going to take the med cap and scare the world by possibly becoming a Doctor or a NP. I'll find my way back to myself no matter what it takes at least for now I have a roof over my head and my blog land friends to fill my head with how big my boobs are. Is that so wrong?
Let the true be know that whilst in nursing school they didn't tell me that women would sometimes have claspers in their vaggigna area (usually found on male sharks). Imagine to my dismay of only finding this out after school and whilst having to insert a foley cathater. I have not been the same since.
I also happen to leave Engineer guy behind. He is a good man and I am very sad but he was just not ready for the family life like I was, and you can't fault the man for not really wanting to start a family with me....I'm a little crazy at times but I am always about the love. I still want to have children and he was not ready for that with me. I totally understand, no hard feelings. So if you know any Ice islanders out there(that speak no English I prefer) that happen to be really tall, fit with ice blue eyes and a really nice body.... and is dumber than the average tool in the shead will you keep me posted.
Untill then I am going to take the med cap and scare the world by possibly becoming a Doctor or a NP. I'll find my way back to myself no matter what it takes at least for now I have a roof over my head and my blog land friends to fill my head with how big my boobs are. Is that so wrong?
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Estava Gone
This morning I awoke at 0200 am, curled my hair put on a little make-up and headed to the airport via taxi. I ran away from home.
I know usually I would be telling about the time I ran away from home when I was 15 yrs old only to have my Ma find me at my Aunt's house. My Ma knew everything; I am sure that my Aunt didn't rat me out. I think she must of had some tracking device placed underneath my scalp or something when I was to young or unaware of what was happening to me.
I quit my job because I was tired of sticking my finger in old women's vaggignas, and cupping old balls and telling the men to cough. I mean I only really went into Nursing to handle young mens balls and then fondle them a bit, tell the hot guy to cough, then fondle them some more and then tell them to cough again. I think I might have just gotten away with it too. I also only worked in the ER to pull Dr. Goldenrod into the clean utiltiy room from time to time. I mean I really only have asked him to give me a breast examination.... because you all know how much I believe in checking your breast montly.... or in the case of pulling him into the clean utility room weekly. All in the name of medicine I swear.
I know usually I would be telling about the time I ran away from home when I was 15 yrs old only to have my Ma find me at my Aunt's house. My Ma knew everything; I am sure that my Aunt didn't rat me out. I think she must of had some tracking device placed underneath my scalp or something when I was to young or unaware of what was happening to me.
I quit my job because I was tired of sticking my finger in old women's vaggignas, and cupping old balls and telling the men to cough. I mean I only really went into Nursing to handle young mens balls and then fondle them a bit, tell the hot guy to cough, then fondle them some more and then tell them to cough again. I think I might have just gotten away with it too. I also only worked in the ER to pull Dr. Goldenrod into the clean utiltiy room from time to time. I mean I really only have asked him to give me a breast examination.... because you all know how much I believe in checking your breast montly.... or in the case of pulling him into the clean utility room weekly. All in the name of medicine I swear.
Sunday, September 07, 2008
The secret I have been keeping...
So, I know that you all know that I am very shy, I mean I never report all of my dirty little secrets... But for some reason I am compelled to reveal something that is so private, just so so secret that even my Ma doesn't know...ohhh should she know?? You know that all she talk about is her period (just to torture me as if ? showing off her DD after two kid they are still standing up and they are real yeah yeah I know Ma you have cramps all the time) My father definitely doesn't know because I am a virgin or at least I was until I was married at the very young age of 19. Somehow by a miracle of nature I got pregnant . I don't know how it happen. Oh, my boy is the love of life my life , but but this is not the secret...The secret is, this is really shocking that Engineer guy has a third nipple. I know I was shocked too.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
For a while now...
For a while now I have been thinking about revealing my most embarrassing moment..
And now you might ask yourself why in the world would she want to do that? It is possible that I might have lost my mind, but I though what the hell why not...
But before I do I am going to need a little egging on...
So, please blogger friends tell me what your most embarrassing moment?
Okay I will give you a little hint...
It has something to do with the very first time I had sexual relations with Engineer Guy..
Ohhh how much he must really Love me...
And now you might ask yourself why in the world would she want to do that? It is possible that I might have lost my mind, but I though what the hell why not...
But before I do I am going to need a little egging on...
So, please blogger friends tell me what your most embarrassing moment?
Okay I will give you a little hint...
It has something to do with the very first time I had sexual relations with Engineer Guy..
Ohhh how much he must really Love me...
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Dave Mathews here I come...
Sorry I haven't been by in a couple of days but Engineer guy and I had friends in from Florida and then the marathon of drinking began...
We were getting ready for the Dave Mathew's Band on Saturday!
Hey I can't help it the boys are from West Virgina need I say more...
This weekend has been a blur of tons of food and drinks...
Sorry trainer...
I couldn't work out do to my commitments to the drink and partying that I am obligated to do when the friends from Florida are in town...
Let's just say that we all kept our clothes on but ummm couldn't understand a word the boys were saying due to the commencement to trying to out drink each other....
and then there was the game of oh...sing New Edition song to me...
or Janet Jackson if your nasty...
Hey all check out my friends music...
Shanemeade.com
You won't be sorry!!!
We were getting ready for the Dave Mathew's Band on Saturday!
Hey I can't help it the boys are from West Virgina need I say more...
This weekend has been a blur of tons of food and drinks...
Sorry trainer...
I couldn't work out do to my commitments to the drink and partying that I am obligated to do when the friends from Florida are in town...
Let's just say that we all kept our clothes on but ummm couldn't understand a word the boys were saying due to the commencement to trying to out drink each other....
and then there was the game of oh...sing New Edition song to me...
or Janet Jackson if your nasty...
Hey all check out my friends music...
Shanemeade.com
You won't be sorry!!!
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
I must pass on this life saving information....
Studies show that having sex 200 times a year + with the same partner, that you are connected too has health benefits....
Sweet...I tell Engineer guy this very fact and that I expect him to live up to the challenge because he is inevitably in charge of saving my life....
Apparently the ability to connect to a human being is not only good for your physical health but your mental health as well...
I guess this is why chemistry is sooo important in picking relationships....
So, all of my blogger friends go home and molest the one that you love it could just save your life....
Sweet...I tell Engineer guy this very fact and that I expect him to live up to the challenge because he is inevitably in charge of saving my life....
Apparently the ability to connect to a human being is not only good for your physical health but your mental health as well...
I guess this is why chemistry is sooo important in picking relationships....
So, all of my blogger friends go home and molest the one that you love it could just save your life....
Friday, August 15, 2008
First things first...
1: Never take 3 tabs of colon cleaner...
I mean I have not been able to leave the house all day do to my commitment to the toilet if you know what I mean... and the clincher of it all is I worked at an endoclinic yesterday...You know where they stick the camera where the sun doesn't shine...
2. Okay so you know I said I was getting a trainer...what was I thinking...after the first time with the trainer my legs were so sore I could hardly walk...being how I am not a quitter I went back Saturday...OGMOSH...
Abs...what do I need abs for? really I mean I my stomach is already trained to be sucked in at all times...
So, now My abs are sore...my arse is on the toilet ever ten minutes and the rest of my body is not feeling so hot either...
What is wrong with me? I am only doing this because society says I have to be a size Zero...
Just kidding...I happen to need a break of my old ruin and I am being a big baby...usually I am not this much of a pussy but since Engineer guy doesn't feel sorry for me I have to get sympathy somewhere...is it working??
I mean I have not been able to leave the house all day do to my commitment to the toilet if you know what I mean... and the clincher of it all is I worked at an endoclinic yesterday...You know where they stick the camera where the sun doesn't shine...
2. Okay so you know I said I was getting a trainer...what was I thinking...after the first time with the trainer my legs were so sore I could hardly walk...being how I am not a quitter I went back Saturday...OGMOSH...
Abs...what do I need abs for? really I mean I my stomach is already trained to be sucked in at all times...
So, now My abs are sore...my arse is on the toilet ever ten minutes and the rest of my body is not feeling so hot either...
What is wrong with me? I am only doing this because society says I have to be a size Zero...
Just kidding...I happen to need a break of my old ruin and I am being a big baby...usually I am not this much of a pussy but since Engineer guy doesn't feel sorry for me I have to get sympathy somewhere...is it working??
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Yes, I stated the night at the fire station
Okay...this could only happen to me. I found myself driving to a hospital about an 1&1/2 hours away from my house. As fate would have it they wanted me to work 2 days in a row. Now how could I say No...This was a very small town where everyone knows everyone...Don't you love that. So, i thought well if I am going to work two days I better stay the night there so I don't have to drag my arse all the way home and then all the way back. One of the nurses husband was a fireman hens I found myself spending the night at the fire station. Now what does this say about me???
Now you know what they say about the LADIES that spend the night at the fire house...Don't ya just love the gosip...Now the RN stated make sure you keep this on the down low...AHhhh yeah she was telling everyone that I stayed at the fire house. How can you keep a secret in a town that has one high school...It never fails I am always trouble...trouble is my middle name. Hey I slept in the back room by myself.....with all the fire gear on is that wrong???
Now you know what they say about the LADIES that spend the night at the fire house...Don't ya just love the gosip...Now the RN stated make sure you keep this on the down low...AHhhh yeah she was telling everyone that I stayed at the fire house. How can you keep a secret in a town that has one high school...It never fails I am always trouble...trouble is my middle name. Hey I slept in the back room by myself.....with all the fire gear on is that wrong???
Tuesday, August 05, 2008
Dr. Oz on Oprah...
So I was watching Oprah, Dr. Oz stated that if you drink red wine that it turns on an anit-aging process. Well, let me tell you that is all I needed...
I am going to be young forever cause I believe in drinking the wine...
He also stated that Liver cod oil was good for you..
I am having a hard time with this only because when I was a young girl my Ma decided to lie to us and say that she was making fried chicken when really it was Liver in a battered surprise. Didn't she know that I was going to be a medical detective and I could never fall for that trick...
Ma I say just drink some wine, cause I can't take the liver cod oil....
I am going to be young forever cause I believe in drinking the wine...
He also stated that Liver cod oil was good for you..
I am having a hard time with this only because when I was a young girl my Ma decided to lie to us and say that she was making fried chicken when really it was Liver in a battered surprise. Didn't she know that I was going to be a medical detective and I could never fall for that trick...
Ma I say just drink some wine, cause I can't take the liver cod oil....
Monday, August 04, 2008
Let's get a new mamma....
So, I have been watching one of thoughts shows that change "the mommy" for a week and then get 50.000 dollars...
I say to Engineer guy...Let's audition for the show so that we can get a new mommy for the week..
Coarse I didn't know who we would send to be the new mommy for the other people. Could we send the kid to be the new mommy? He is kind of spoiled and we never make him cook...So, I am not sure that will be a good idea. We can't send my mother because I'm not sure she that she can handle other people's children. She can hardly handle my sister's children and that is after she is pre-medicated. We can't send Engineer guy because he refuses to be the mommy for other people.
I ask him maybe we can send your mother what do you think? He says he doesn't think that she will go for it. So, I guess that we will not be auditioning for the show..Me I am not grown up enough to be on tv and be a mommy to other people's children...
I say to Engineer guy...Let's audition for the show so that we can get a new mommy for the week..
Coarse I didn't know who we would send to be the new mommy for the other people. Could we send the kid to be the new mommy? He is kind of spoiled and we never make him cook...So, I am not sure that will be a good idea. We can't send my mother because I'm not sure she that she can handle other people's children. She can hardly handle my sister's children and that is after she is pre-medicated. We can't send Engineer guy because he refuses to be the mommy for other people.
I ask him maybe we can send your mother what do you think? He says he doesn't think that she will go for it. So, I guess that we will not be auditioning for the show..Me I am not grown up enough to be on tv and be a mommy to other people's children...
Sunday, August 03, 2008
Did I mention that...
Did I mention that I have a growth growing on the side of my neck...
It's not an abcess, but a pesky little pimple that never seems to go away..
I squished it this morning only to have little success of getting anything out of it and it is red and swollen...
Imagine that...I have used every pimple remover on the market but nothing seems to help...
I am left to only pretend that I do not see it in hopes that it will see that it no longer bothers me and goes away...
Did I mention that I have decided to get a personal trainer...
I hate working out, but know that it is something that I have to do because I am aware that gravity will take it's toll on my butt and promptly help it drag the ground. Plus what would Oprah think if if she ever met me and my butt was draggin the ground...and there is my reputation to think about... I am hoping that the trainer is really good looking so that I have something to look forward too when I work out...
Did I mention that my Uncle has dragon shoes that he wears when he does out..My Aunt calls it that because every time he goes out his friends drag him back into the house...
It's not an abcess, but a pesky little pimple that never seems to go away..
I squished it this morning only to have little success of getting anything out of it and it is red and swollen...
Imagine that...I have used every pimple remover on the market but nothing seems to help...
I am left to only pretend that I do not see it in hopes that it will see that it no longer bothers me and goes away...
Did I mention that I have decided to get a personal trainer...
I hate working out, but know that it is something that I have to do because I am aware that gravity will take it's toll on my butt and promptly help it drag the ground. Plus what would Oprah think if if she ever met me and my butt was draggin the ground...and there is my reputation to think about... I am hoping that the trainer is really good looking so that I have something to look forward too when I work out...
Did I mention that my Uncle has dragon shoes that he wears when he does out..My Aunt calls it that because every time he goes out his friends drag him back into the house...
Saturday, August 02, 2008
Is that so wrong??
I have often told my patients, I know this whole getting old thing is pretty unfair...
There's no instructions on how to get old...
But I say that when I get old I am going to have big blue or purplish-pink hair, wear blue eyeshadow with long fake eyelashes and pink pink lipstick...I am going to feel-up all young guys butts and then claim that I am old and I don't know what I am doing...maybe I'll even have a grandchild around to back-up my story...
Is that so wrong?
There's no instructions on how to get old...
But I say that when I get old I am going to have big blue or purplish-pink hair, wear blue eyeshadow with long fake eyelashes and pink pink lipstick...I am going to feel-up all young guys butts and then claim that I am old and I don't know what I am doing...maybe I'll even have a grandchild around to back-up my story...
Is that so wrong?
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
So, I have been reading this book...
I know your shocked that I actually read books...
I only really read when I am working out to distract my mind of the pain of the work out...
I have always read to zone out when working out. I hate to work out it is just apart of my life style if I want to keep my butt under control if you know what I mean...You know I have to keep my known T &A... reputation...
Well, the book is about " What my past relationships with women have taught me"... a fabulous Idea if you ask me....and then I begin to think about what I have taught the men that have dated me...
Oh how I feel for them...
You could say that when I was younger I wasn't exactly the nicest girl out there...
I got married very young because I thought you couldn't get out of Arkansas if you didn't get married and have a child. I quickly decided after I had my child that I didn't really like the married life due to the limitation that it imposed on me. So, I left and started busting my arse to get though college and have a life of my own that I could be proud of. I did happen to date one guy 5 yrs younger than me after my divorce. 5 yrs later I know I must have messed him up somehow although we are still friends and I have limited contact with him due to my loyaly to Engineer guy.
So, after reading the book I felt a little guilty but then I thought it is all about the learning process. I had to go though all of what I did in order to be where I am today.
So, tell me what you have taught the men in your life or tell me what the women have taught you in your life...
I only really read when I am working out to distract my mind of the pain of the work out...
I have always read to zone out when working out. I hate to work out it is just apart of my life style if I want to keep my butt under control if you know what I mean...You know I have to keep my known T &A... reputation...
Well, the book is about " What my past relationships with women have taught me"... a fabulous Idea if you ask me....and then I begin to think about what I have taught the men that have dated me...
Oh how I feel for them...
You could say that when I was younger I wasn't exactly the nicest girl out there...
I got married very young because I thought you couldn't get out of Arkansas if you didn't get married and have a child. I quickly decided after I had my child that I didn't really like the married life due to the limitation that it imposed on me. So, I left and started busting my arse to get though college and have a life of my own that I could be proud of. I did happen to date one guy 5 yrs younger than me after my divorce. 5 yrs later I know I must have messed him up somehow although we are still friends and I have limited contact with him due to my loyaly to Engineer guy.
So, after reading the book I felt a little guilty but then I thought it is all about the learning process. I had to go though all of what I did in order to be where I am today.
So, tell me what you have taught the men in your life or tell me what the women have taught you in your life...
Monday, July 28, 2008
cramps...are the pits....
If I have cramps I must tell everyone and let them be as miserable as I am..WTF?
While I was working today minding my own business caring for patients telling them about my uncle that married his step sister (Arkansas is all I can say) when she was 15 and he was 20yr. My lower quadrant bilaterally decided to turn against me and cause me pain. How dare my body decide to cause me pain when I am clearly trying to save lives...I mean really. What kind of shitniz it that? I think I am going to go on strike against my lower quadrant. Can you do that? And and I have been in the pisser about 20 million times daily. I mean I am a water drinker and all but this is just ridiculous. So my medical mind goes wild and thinks about all the things that could be wrong with me...Diabetes insipitus (I just might die) ...My ovaries seem to be mad at me..I have been giving the vag plenty of loving from Engineer guy so I can't imagine why they are turning against me... Engineer guy handles business almost every night...Is that normal? The vag seems to be happy, she never complains and really tells me that she enjoys hanging with Engineer guy peni... so what is the deal??? Oh that Eve....why why did you have to eat the apple???
While I was working today minding my own business caring for patients telling them about my uncle that married his step sister (Arkansas is all I can say) when she was 15 and he was 20yr. My lower quadrant bilaterally decided to turn against me and cause me pain. How dare my body decide to cause me pain when I am clearly trying to save lives...I mean really. What kind of shitniz it that? I think I am going to go on strike against my lower quadrant. Can you do that? And and I have been in the pisser about 20 million times daily. I mean I am a water drinker and all but this is just ridiculous. So my medical mind goes wild and thinks about all the things that could be wrong with me...Diabetes insipitus (I just might die) ...My ovaries seem to be mad at me..I have been giving the vag plenty of loving from Engineer guy so I can't imagine why they are turning against me... Engineer guy handles business almost every night...Is that normal? The vag seems to be happy, she never complains and really tells me that she enjoys hanging with Engineer guy peni... so what is the deal??? Oh that Eve....why why did you have to eat the apple???
Friday, July 25, 2008
I think you can die from bordom...
I know that I shouldn't complain about staying home and having free time to do what ever I please but I can't seem to get the bordom out of me....
I have gone out with friends...
Okay that is another story all together..
What is it with rich drunk people that get on your nerves...
Okay so my nails aren't manicured...I freakin work in an ER my hands arn't that perddy because I wear gloves all day and wash them 20 million times to cut down on infection transmission..shoot me why don't ya.
In attempts to amuse myself I have given myself a facial...okay not really I did put on a mask to tone my face. I have talked to my son several times today but he is only interested in watching disney TV the nerve of him. It is like I am not cool to hang out with why I can't imagine why any 13yr. boy wouldn't like to hang out with his mother.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
I'm Bored
Sheesh...Summer time in the desert is not very busy for registry nurses hence I have been home all week on the couch watching ever FBI file show imaginable, every investigative show on finding murderers, robbers and rapists; Still bored. This usually entertains me and gives me hours of nonstop techniques just in case I ever want to go undercover as as an FBI agent or maybe even a CIA agent.(totally possible) Not to mention the fact that something is wrong with my computer and I am convinced B@#$ B&^ is keeping my computer and down loading all the naked pictures of myself that I have collected over the years...(only pure art people I swear) and father that is just a joke okay.
What can I do with myself? What to do I think as I twiddle my thumbs? The kid is like a never ending eating machine and I can only cook and clean so much before I start to lose my mind. I have a secrete to tell all of you...I know I know...If I don't work on a regular basis I start to get anxiety, like I will not have enough money to feed the kid or pay my bills. This has been a life long problem for me due to the fact that I grew up poor, and I might just have a slight case of neurosis, but I know that you all can keep a secrete.
So, I have only been able to access the Internet when "Engineer guy" get home were I trample him and jump on his laptop. It is like I am shut off to the world. I can't stand it and to make matters worse the company fixing my computer is going to take another several days to fix and then I must find the back up disks to get all the windows stuff...Oh like I really know where thoughts are. What kind of woman do they think I am...I am not a filer of important information. I never expected my computer to turn against me in the first place and I surly can't figure out how to put all that stuff back on it. I am scratching my head asking them why they didn't back up that information don't they know that I am computer illiterate. The very reason I took the computer to the Geek squad in the first place...Ain't they supposed to have all the answers, how dare they.
So, now I am bored awaiting Engineer guy to get home so I can pump him with questions about he work day. Another thing you might not know about me is that I have a rule that when I am off from work I can't leave the house until after 2:oopm. It is blazing hot here 115 degrees I am trying to fight the aging process here so I don't want to expose my already tan skin to more UVB rays. I am left with not thing to do but torture the kid...."Your lips are dry you need to drink more water" " kid I need to read random stuff from the book"Why do Men have Nipples" in order to school him why people urine smells when they eat asparagus. This only entertains me for about a half an hour when i find out that he is really interested in belly button lint.
Thankfully I am meeting some co-workers out tonight for dinner to discuss my changing of Careers. Wish me luck and please hope that I work tomorrow before the kid and Engineer guy put me out of the house.
What can I do with myself? What to do I think as I twiddle my thumbs? The kid is like a never ending eating machine and I can only cook and clean so much before I start to lose my mind. I have a secrete to tell all of you...I know I know...If I don't work on a regular basis I start to get anxiety, like I will not have enough money to feed the kid or pay my bills. This has been a life long problem for me due to the fact that I grew up poor, and I might just have a slight case of neurosis, but I know that you all can keep a secrete.
So, I have only been able to access the Internet when "Engineer guy" get home were I trample him and jump on his laptop. It is like I am shut off to the world. I can't stand it and to make matters worse the company fixing my computer is going to take another several days to fix and then I must find the back up disks to get all the windows stuff...Oh like I really know where thoughts are. What kind of woman do they think I am...I am not a filer of important information. I never expected my computer to turn against me in the first place and I surly can't figure out how to put all that stuff back on it. I am scratching my head asking them why they didn't back up that information don't they know that I am computer illiterate. The very reason I took the computer to the Geek squad in the first place...Ain't they supposed to have all the answers, how dare they.
So, now I am bored awaiting Engineer guy to get home so I can pump him with questions about he work day. Another thing you might not know about me is that I have a rule that when I am off from work I can't leave the house until after 2:oopm. It is blazing hot here 115 degrees I am trying to fight the aging process here so I don't want to expose my already tan skin to more UVB rays. I am left with not thing to do but torture the kid...."Your lips are dry you need to drink more water" " kid I need to read random stuff from the book"Why do Men have Nipples" in order to school him why people urine smells when they eat asparagus. This only entertains me for about a half an hour when i find out that he is really interested in belly button lint.
Thankfully I am meeting some co-workers out tonight for dinner to discuss my changing of Careers. Wish me luck and please hope that I work tomorrow before the kid and Engineer guy put me out of the house.
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Random &#!+ from my couch...
Not much going on this week except for talking with my girlfriend several times a day on the phone and sitting, laying on the couch.
I think that you can exercise from the couch if you have wieghts...I am testing that theory, so far it hasen't worked but I am hopeful....
It is true I have been in a funk this week due to my recent events however I am not going to let the haters win...I refuse. So, while sitting on the couch today I flashed my boobs to the construction workers behind my house. They actually gave me a 10 for style and a 10 for size...
Well, you know what I wanted to do with that information...I wanted to take a picture of the hard working construction workers and send it to the haters at work...
Thanks for your support blog BFF's
I think that you can exercise from the couch if you have wieghts...I am testing that theory, so far it hasen't worked but I am hopeful....
It is true I have been in a funk this week due to my recent events however I am not going to let the haters win...I refuse. So, while sitting on the couch today I flashed my boobs to the construction workers behind my house. They actually gave me a 10 for style and a 10 for size...
Well, you know what I wanted to do with that information...I wanted to take a picture of the hard working construction workers and send it to the haters at work...
Thanks for your support blog BFF's
Monday, July 21, 2008
Changing my life cause I can't change me...
I hate growing pains...
I mean when I was pregnant with the kid there were all kinds of growing pains. First of all my once flat tummybegan to enlarged with strech marks deeper than the grand canyon, it was like having an alien inside me for 10 months...again my body has changed forever...but I am sure that I would due it again in a heartbeat just to have that darn kid.
I have been thinking about re-eventing myself like Madonna has so many times in the past years. Can I leave nursing all together? I think I can if I can't get away with the pettiness of the hospital nurses.
Does anyone have any suggestions...
I thought about being a stripper but I am really to old for that...
I thought about being an accountant, but I can't do math very well...
I thought about being Mike Roug in "Dirty jobs" but I can't deal with all the crazy crap he has to do I am not good at manual labor...
I thought about becoming a truck driver so that I could cuss on a regular basis and no one would even back an eye...
I thought I could be a professsional wine taster but I don't think they pay your for that...I think you have to pay the wine people...
I know that I would be good at any job that I required me to sit on the couch..
I thought about writting a book but that takes time and knowing me I would try to write on the couch and watch TV at the same time. Procrastination at its best.
I mean when I was pregnant with the kid there were all kinds of growing pains. First of all my once flat tummybegan to enlarged with strech marks deeper than the grand canyon, it was like having an alien inside me for 10 months...again my body has changed forever...but I am sure that I would due it again in a heartbeat just to have that darn kid.
I have been thinking about re-eventing myself like Madonna has so many times in the past years. Can I leave nursing all together? I think I can if I can't get away with the pettiness of the hospital nurses.
Does anyone have any suggestions...
I thought about being a stripper but I am really to old for that...
I thought about being an accountant, but I can't do math very well...
I thought about being Mike Roug in "Dirty jobs" but I can't deal with all the crazy crap he has to do I am not good at manual labor...
I thought about becoming a truck driver so that I could cuss on a regular basis and no one would even back an eye...
I thought I could be a professsional wine taster but I don't think they pay your for that...I think you have to pay the wine people...
I know that I would be good at any job that I required me to sit on the couch..
I thought about writting a book but that takes time and knowing me I would try to write on the couch and watch TV at the same time. Procrastination at its best.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Dealing with the not so nice people of the world...
Several months ago I went to work where I promptly heard that the night charge nurse called me T & A...( I hear that that means titties and ass) how dare her say such a thing about me behind my back, but not to my face...By the way they all call her the Beast behind her back... but I only said you have nice titties too...sheesh..
Now while I find this mostly a compliment...I happened to go to a Christian college and I have a BSN and I feel like my job is a unprofessional professional job...
What is a girl to do...If I know too much and I have big boobs apparently the some nurses are offended...
How can that be?
My main concern are the patients that I take care of and trying to facilitate a team environment... and where has that got me...just down to the T & A????
You see there are a shortage of nurses not because nursing is hard but because nurses that really care about their patients and tend to be there advocate are made examples of...harsh words to be said about a nurse that really cares and that also might work out on a regular basis and might not smoke due to her very duty of living life as they preach...
While I might not be upset of my best girlfriends use my boobs as party favors I would like it if my professional life didn't include a description of my boobs...they are big they can't be hidden I have even bought scrubs that are like 2 times bigger for me so that my boobs don't take over the show...
Women why do you have to be so mean...I'm such a loving person...I know that my blog friend women are nothing like the women that I work with but I am rethinking my job as a nurse....how can this be????
Now while I find this mostly a compliment...I happened to go to a Christian college and I have a BSN and I feel like my job is a unprofessional professional job...
What is a girl to do...If I know too much and I have big boobs apparently the some nurses are offended...
How can that be?
My main concern are the patients that I take care of and trying to facilitate a team environment... and where has that got me...just down to the T & A????
You see there are a shortage of nurses not because nursing is hard but because nurses that really care about their patients and tend to be there advocate are made examples of...harsh words to be said about a nurse that really cares and that also might work out on a regular basis and might not smoke due to her very duty of living life as they preach...
While I might not be upset of my best girlfriends use my boobs as party favors I would like it if my professional life didn't include a description of my boobs...they are big they can't be hidden I have even bought scrubs that are like 2 times bigger for me so that my boobs don't take over the show...
Women why do you have to be so mean...I'm such a loving person...I know that my blog friend women are nothing like the women that I work with but I am rethinking my job as a nurse....how can this be????
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
My idea of a vacation...
I am on my way home from a 3day vacation..
Most people's idea of a vacation would not require their butt to be in a saddle for 3 hours a day and having a really biggg horse between their legs..but that is just me..
I am leaving the country and I was so sad to leave this morning sure I was in potato land..idaho..in moreman land Utah...
But I was free, with the wind blowing through my hair..
The horse flies large as bats biting at my horse and at my neck...Damn blood suckers.
I can barely walk without a deep soreness in my haunches.
I am happy sore or not..
and you should have seen my kid on the horses...he was the shiznizil
Most people's idea of a vacation would not require their butt to be in a saddle for 3 hours a day and having a really biggg horse between their legs..but that is just me..
I am leaving the country and I was so sad to leave this morning sure I was in potato land..idaho..in moreman land Utah...
But I was free, with the wind blowing through my hair..
The horse flies large as bats biting at my horse and at my neck...Damn blood suckers.
I can barely walk without a deep soreness in my haunches.
I am happy sore or not..
and you should have seen my kid on the horses...he was the shiznizil
Tuesday, July 08, 2008
I'm not dead I swear..
Sorry about being MIA...
Engineer guys family is in town and I have been working like a mad woman...
I started a blog the other day that entitled Life with out AMie...but then thought that I might sound as if I am famous in my own mind which of coarse all of you that know me is aware of this very image that I have of myself...of coarse with out all the money and I have to admit most famous people do not have their fingers in places where the sun doesn't shine..AkA vagignas...old balls...
If fact I was talking to Rob RN about his family as we often like to discus all of their wonderfully crazy behavior and wondered why most families were not like ours...
Rob's family are great loving people but his father often like to torture the famly by arriving in the living room in a wife beater and underware that has long left the stages normal wear and tear...some would even call them dead...So he tells me the otyher day his brother went to visit the family and his father appeared in the living room in all his splender with his balls haning out...
No one even blinked an eye ; apparently this is normal behavior for his...then we were discussing if he had long blall hair hanging out too...( I know this is how I amuse myself) He said, Amie his ball hair has long left him like the hair on top of his head...and then it came to me...
Do men lose ball hair like they lose hair on their head...
At least he didn't have to go through the stages of pub hair turning grey...
I think most men these days just shave their balls or is that jsut my family where by my sister tells me how she shaves her husbands ball hair in the shower...
And you wonder what is wrong with me....
I am on my way to the land of the dead...but I will catch up tonight on everyone...
I miss you all...
Engineer guys family is in town and I have been working like a mad woman...
I started a blog the other day that entitled Life with out AMie...but then thought that I might sound as if I am famous in my own mind which of coarse all of you that know me is aware of this very image that I have of myself...of coarse with out all the money and I have to admit most famous people do not have their fingers in places where the sun doesn't shine..AkA vagignas...old balls...
If fact I was talking to Rob RN about his family as we often like to discus all of their wonderfully crazy behavior and wondered why most families were not like ours...
Rob's family are great loving people but his father often like to torture the famly by arriving in the living room in a wife beater and underware that has long left the stages normal wear and tear...some would even call them dead...So he tells me the otyher day his brother went to visit the family and his father appeared in the living room in all his splender with his balls haning out...
No one even blinked an eye ; apparently this is normal behavior for his...then we were discussing if he had long blall hair hanging out too...( I know this is how I amuse myself) He said, Amie his ball hair has long left him like the hair on top of his head...and then it came to me...
Do men lose ball hair like they lose hair on their head...
At least he didn't have to go through the stages of pub hair turning grey...
I think most men these days just shave their balls or is that jsut my family where by my sister tells me how she shaves her husbands ball hair in the shower...
And you wonder what is wrong with me....
I am on my way to the land of the dead...but I will catch up tonight on everyone...
I miss you all...
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Chronicals of love...
Still not sure what is going on at my house...
First things first:
Usually I like to talk about the little things that make me laugh in life...
Like the time I got shat on at 6 in the morning by a patient and the male nurse helping me got poo on his forehead. After all isn't life supposed to be about the little things that bring us happiness? Like this blog I started it after I broke up with Paramedic Guy...Ohhh paramedic guy...You know that it is bad when you are talking to one of the nurses that you work with and simultaneously you say, " I bet my fire medic story is better than yours". Then, I was still in nursing school a little naive and didn't know that the firefighters like to shall we say spread the lovein. These days when fire brings us patients we stick to the basics, we give them $#!+, take report and them boot em out.
So Engineer guy and I went shopping this weekend for a new couch and a bed and dresser for me. We had fun looking at at all the different couches and beds. I have moved into his house as you know but I'm not sure it was really what he wanted. I'm not sure how relationships are supposed to go. But he reminded me that at the end of the summer he is going to move into the bedroom that I have all of my stuff in maybe a hint that I need to find my own place. My mind is De boggled. I am not sure how a relationship continues on after you live with someone and then move out. It seems weird to me. It is like he plans his future without me being in it... right in front of me. I know that when he was talking to me about his plans for the future of his place he didn't mean to hurt my feelings but it makes me wonder what am I doing. I hate living in lingo out of boxes and my heart is heavy. I'm not sure that I will ever get this love thing right.
First things first:
Usually I like to talk about the little things that make me laugh in life...
Like the time I got shat on at 6 in the morning by a patient and the male nurse helping me got poo on his forehead. After all isn't life supposed to be about the little things that bring us happiness? Like this blog I started it after I broke up with Paramedic Guy...Ohhh paramedic guy...You know that it is bad when you are talking to one of the nurses that you work with and simultaneously you say, " I bet my fire medic story is better than yours". Then, I was still in nursing school a little naive and didn't know that the firefighters like to shall we say spread the lovein. These days when fire brings us patients we stick to the basics, we give them $#!+, take report and them boot em out.
So Engineer guy and I went shopping this weekend for a new couch and a bed and dresser for me. We had fun looking at at all the different couches and beds. I have moved into his house as you know but I'm not sure it was really what he wanted. I'm not sure how relationships are supposed to go. But he reminded me that at the end of the summer he is going to move into the bedroom that I have all of my stuff in maybe a hint that I need to find my own place. My mind is De boggled. I am not sure how a relationship continues on after you live with someone and then move out. It seems weird to me. It is like he plans his future without me being in it... right in front of me. I know that when he was talking to me about his plans for the future of his place he didn't mean to hurt my feelings but it makes me wonder what am I doing. I hate living in lingo out of boxes and my heart is heavy. I'm not sure that I will ever get this love thing right.
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Legend...Ohhh Trisian Just come home...
I think there should be a sport called laying on the couch and watching TV. I am notoriously known for eating, drinking, showering and even having sexual relations whilst parked front and center on the couch. When Engineer guy goes out of town I become even more competitive with myself...pushing the limits to what can be done whilst my butt is on the couch. Why I have even shaved my feet on the couch. No worries I let the dead skin fall to the ground and then I promptly vacuumed them up...still on the couch.I know some of you might think that this whole sporting event (that I have made up in my mind) might seem sloth-like but I assure you that I am not lazy; I prefer to call it procrastinationalistic at its best. I think I might have even won an award for procrastination, but as rumor might have it ...I didn't attend the ceremonies due in largely by my need to lay on the couch.
Where do you ask did I learn such techniques? Of coarse from the master herself...Ma. She never needed to leave the couch because she tortured Me into doing all the chores that she refused to do from the couch. At least I have some kind of drive... at least I vacuum. I actually believe procrastination is a X dominate trait passed down from generations to generations. My sister it seems too is also inflicted with this trait; however she has 4 kiddos to do all her errands, grocery shopping, cooking and cleaning. Those kids I tell you what they are efficient. The last time I went to her house I was told by the MP that I could not drive on base ...so my middle niece at 5 yrs old had to drive me around...
So, whilst Engineer guy is out of town next week I will be permanently parked front and center on the couch. I'll pull out my porno Legend of the falls...and say out loud...Ohhhh Tristan come back to me I know I can heal your broken heart. Man I love that move...
Monday, June 09, 2008
PMS isn't that a B!+@#
According to my PMS regulator that I wear on my badge I am at high amount of hormones currently...
So, please excuse me this week if I sound a little B!+@#%...
Ever just have thoughs days where you have a random hair on your chin and you spend hours trying to pick it off your chin...
Or have you ever had thoughs days that you ask your self why do I care really...
I wish sometimes that I had a heart of tin or stone so that my heart would not care as much but much to my brains distern I can not help that feeling of caring about others...
You you can imagine when I uncovered a man tonight with a oxegen hose up his peni...
Tears to my eyes as I try and make him feel comfortable...
Alone and trying not to feel a burning pain to his leg he became hopeless...
This is why I say take my mind before my body starts to give..
He was a sweet man and I did what I could do...
I'm not sure I will not ever be able not to care..
and this is apart of what is wrong with me...
So, please excuse me this week if I sound a little B!+@#%...
Ever just have thoughs days where you have a random hair on your chin and you spend hours trying to pick it off your chin...
Or have you ever had thoughs days that you ask your self why do I care really...
I wish sometimes that I had a heart of tin or stone so that my heart would not care as much but much to my brains distern I can not help that feeling of caring about others...
You you can imagine when I uncovered a man tonight with a oxegen hose up his peni...
Tears to my eyes as I try and make him feel comfortable...
Alone and trying not to feel a burning pain to his leg he became hopeless...
This is why I say take my mind before my body starts to give..
He was a sweet man and I did what I could do...
I'm not sure I will not ever be able not to care..
and this is apart of what is wrong with me...
Saturday, June 07, 2008
Me at five years old..oh how things change....
A day and a life of me...up at 9:00 am and then off to work by `1400 (2:00 pm)...
2 Gun Shot Wounds at the same time...
We are not a trauma center and we have to fly these people out!!
my fingers in some 90 ish old womans vagina..
2 MVA at the same time...again fly these young boys out!!
One trauma with a nose that has been removed from a young mans face...Send him to a trauma center...yell at the paramedic..this guy is a trauma get your monitor and he is on a back board in c-spine precations..handle it...they think I am mean..
no I am just serious...this kid could die of shock...
Giving pain drugs that are ten times stronger than morphine IV..
starting an IV on a 6 week old baby in respritory distress..
leaving at 4:00 am..
Molesting Engineer guy...he is a team player...
Then up again to do it all over again..
and you wonder why I am not normal???
Thursday, June 05, 2008
You know you are tired when...
You know you are tired when you wake up with a peanut butter sandwich half eaten smashed to the side of your face...
oh and you have to wash the sheets before Engineer guy gets home...
I hope he doesn't read this..
oh and you have to wash the sheets before Engineer guy gets home...
I hope he doesn't read this..
Wednesday, June 04, 2008
I'm crazy I have finally accepted it...
I am so tired, I mean my new shift at work is 2 pm to 2 am. I know they are out to get me...
Some one is trying to torchure me... I think they are plotting against me...I feel like I should be wearing a letter A on my scrub top. Maybe they think I am a witch or something. I feel like Deme More in the movie "Letter A "(totally not a bad thing right althought the film got bad ratings) I wouldn't mind being her you got to love her hair and she is married to a younger guy, but I heard that he has a small peni...not so good. No you can work with it I think or so I have heard. Maybe he is really good at massaging stuff if you know what I mean. Engineer guy doesn't have that problem so I wouldn't really know I am just guesstimating. ( father I am a virgin I swear, I only see peni at work and let me tell you is isn't pretty). There is nothing pretty about old balls with grey pubs that hang to the ground. Did I just say that out loud, for get that I said that. Moving on I know you all think I have an obsession with peni and I do but can you just accept it and just give me the love. I mean really I am forced to wear the letter A for goodness sakes. Is that wrong? So I have to admit something yes I am p#@@* I moved in with Engineer guy. I know I know I think that he was having Chest pain when I was moving stuff in but he is the love of my life and although it is just for a couple of months I went against the man and hung up my painting in the front room. He is in Vegas right now so he is not aware of my decorations. I just think that he doesn't want me to take over his house, however I thought that if I flashed him my boobs when he gets to the house he won't even notice the painting...What do you think?
The first part of recovery is acceptance...and as my Mother always says all you got to be is pretty...and you wonder what is wrong with me??
Some one is trying to torchure me... I think they are plotting against me...I feel like I should be wearing a letter A on my scrub top. Maybe they think I am a witch or something. I feel like Deme More in the movie "Letter A "(totally not a bad thing right althought the film got bad ratings) I wouldn't mind being her you got to love her hair and she is married to a younger guy, but I heard that he has a small peni...not so good. No you can work with it I think or so I have heard. Maybe he is really good at massaging stuff if you know what I mean. Engineer guy doesn't have that problem so I wouldn't really know I am just guesstimating. ( father I am a virgin I swear, I only see peni at work and let me tell you is isn't pretty). There is nothing pretty about old balls with grey pubs that hang to the ground. Did I just say that out loud, for get that I said that. Moving on I know you all think I have an obsession with peni and I do but can you just accept it and just give me the love. I mean really I am forced to wear the letter A for goodness sakes. Is that wrong? So I have to admit something yes I am p#@@* I moved in with Engineer guy. I know I know I think that he was having Chest pain when I was moving stuff in but he is the love of my life and although it is just for a couple of months I went against the man and hung up my painting in the front room. He is in Vegas right now so he is not aware of my decorations. I just think that he doesn't want me to take over his house, however I thought that if I flashed him my boobs when he gets to the house he won't even notice the painting...What do you think?
The first part of recovery is acceptance...and as my Mother always says all you got to be is pretty...and you wonder what is wrong with me??
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Thoughts I ponder...
I wonder if I have broken the world record for "times in one day a person can flush the toilet. "
Seriously I have to pee every five minutes...
and to make that worse Engineer guy's toilet seems to be the new battle of my life. The very dame of my existence...
I think his toilet is plotting against me or something because it knows that poo is the Nemesis of my life.
I mean really shouldn't you just have to flush it once and all the continence should just magically disappear right? Is that too much to ask for I mean really I do turn on mood music and candle lights but nothing helps.
Wrong not when you use his toilet. It seems like you have to stand there and keep your fingers on the flusher for eternity and then maybe just then you will get lucky and it will swirl all of the water down the drain...
except for small pieces of salad you ate the night before...
Go figure?
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Life is suppost to be a beach right?
First I would like to say that I am wearing granny panties right now while writing this blog...Ahhh I wish my life was like a beach. My life then would be practical I would know what to expect. You know the tide would come in everyday and the tide would go out. The best part of that is that the moon would really be my boss of sorts. I wouldn't have control of the fish that pooped in my water, but I know that I wouldn't have to obsess about the bacteria because I would also have fish that ate poop...life would then be grander right??
I have often told Engineer guy that I love him to the deepest end of the ocean till the very last grain of sand and it is true. Communication is not our strong point I have to say and well I am down right stubborn at times and so is he. What I ask you bloggers is what the key to life? I have search long and hard for it but till it evades me. I mean really shouldn't there be some kind of training coarse that we go though in life that prepares us for relationships?Don't you concur? No matter how hard I try and stick to my guns and I have some big ones...guns that is ...okay I have big boobs too...which sometimes causes me trouble but that is a whole other story I will get to sometime soon. Relationships are hard they can be difficult; personally I would choose to go though life without feelings but that I know is no way to live..Damn it Jim I have gone so soft. I guess it is my old age that has cause me to give a s#!+ these days. Tonight more talks about the future...love and the pursuit of happiness. Until then I am wearing granny panties so I don't have pull them out of my crack!
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Times are a changing...
First, I would like to start off saying that I have made some mistakes these pasty 3 months that may change the coarse of my life forever. However I have been a woman that first totally freaks out, but then reverts back to my military roots; and tends to pull my self up my boot straps with my loving but crazy family at my side...Having said that I have been through worse times and when one door closes the other door opens... I am optimistic even thought I have probably shed enough tears to flood a lake...I take full responsibility I am human that is fallible as all of us are...
Rules of engagement..
Ruloilo 1: Never Never leave any man behind even if you are not sure that you can drag them out of danger or stop the bleeding...
It has come to my attention that my actions over the last several months (and I am not talking about cheating here) are too much for Engineer guy to handle. I can understand He is just trying to protect his heart. I can be pretty harsh at times coming from a military back-round, and I am pretty sure he is really not ready for responsibility of and "even if" relationship with me that is. So, I have decided to move forward and move into a place of my own. I guess when you make mistakes that you have to pay for the consequences and I am ready to do that although it sometimes is a hard pill to swallow.
Rule 2: My sister and I are BFF but we still have some sibling rivalry between us at times. My family is not normal, but who's family really is. What I can say about them...
In the line of fire they come though with their Amarillo sapotos (yellow shoes) on and will fight for the death of you. My Ma was like this," I can talk all the S#!+ about my children but anything said bad about them she would pull your wig off" A true story. My mother in her younger years happen to pull of the wig off a woman that thought she could take my 5'0 ft 98 lb. Mother in a Bar. I guess Ma showed her. My sister you have to love her...She recently went to Washington DC were my Brother-in_law (FLEW IN FROM IRAQ HIS 3rd. TOUR) and gave a speech about communications. in DC After the party my sister and her mother-in-law decided it would be fun to drink 5 or 6 bottles of wine, where in then sister vomited on her ball room dress and found herself naked on the bed next to her Mother-in Law. Yep that is my sister...
I have no bad feelings...
I am happy to have had the time I have with Engineer guy...
It's time for me to do what is responsible... and with I thank you for listening...
Rules of engagement..
Ruloilo 1: Never Never leave any man behind even if you are not sure that you can drag them out of danger or stop the bleeding...
It has come to my attention that my actions over the last several months (and I am not talking about cheating here) are too much for Engineer guy to handle. I can understand He is just trying to protect his heart. I can be pretty harsh at times coming from a military back-round, and I am pretty sure he is really not ready for responsibility of and "even if" relationship with me that is. So, I have decided to move forward and move into a place of my own. I guess when you make mistakes that you have to pay for the consequences and I am ready to do that although it sometimes is a hard pill to swallow.
Rule 2: My sister and I are BFF but we still have some sibling rivalry between us at times. My family is not normal, but who's family really is. What I can say about them...
In the line of fire they come though with their Amarillo sapotos (yellow shoes) on and will fight for the death of you. My Ma was like this," I can talk all the S#!+ about my children but anything said bad about them she would pull your wig off" A true story. My mother in her younger years happen to pull of the wig off a woman that thought she could take my 5'0 ft 98 lb. Mother in a Bar. I guess Ma showed her. My sister you have to love her...She recently went to Washington DC were my Brother-in_law (FLEW IN FROM IRAQ HIS 3rd. TOUR) and gave a speech about communications. in DC After the party my sister and her mother-in-law decided it would be fun to drink 5 or 6 bottles of wine, where in then sister vomited on her ball room dress and found herself naked on the bed next to her Mother-in Law. Yep that is my sister...
I have no bad feelings...
I am happy to have had the time I have with Engineer guy...
It's time for me to do what is responsible... and with I thank you for listening...
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Estava gone...
Estava gone..
Engineer guy is out of town this week and seems like I haven't seen him in forever since last week I was out of town and this week he is in california working and visiting with his brother.
So, I am moving out of my roomates house and into his house...
Kind of weird for both of us:
1: I almost live with him anyway..
2: I have really never lived with a man except for when I was young dumb and married.
3: This is a really big step for him because I a crazy woman due to the very nature of my job.
4: I stick my finger many days were the sun doesn't shine...I mean really I never thought would be touching so many men's peni. I seemed fixated on this very subject I know but like a car accident I can't pull myself away from this very subject.
5: And let me tell you it is a shocker the first time you see old balls...One of the nurses the other day was asking me if it is normal for them to hang so low??
6: How should I know? I am not a guy and I wasn't about to ask one of the Dr. althought they might have thought it intertaining.
7: A fun fact for you all Men when they get older get grey pubs..Why I had no idea untill I was in nursing school...
8: I think I might be a little scarded seeing all the naked people that I have seen in my years as a Nurse.
9: Engineer guy without a fault still wants to have sex with me even after he knows that I have been touching another men's peni...I mean I don't make them cough or anything...okay only one time but I had good reason, and the poor guy just kept saying baseball think about baseball..
10: is that wrong??? Can I just say that the parasympathetic nervous system causes errections and apparently so do I...a compliment I think..
11: Engineer guy's best friend got engaged and moved out last week. It was heart breaking to see how hurt he was since they have lived together for so long. My poor baby is just a guys guy and like to hang with the guys alot. But darn it women come in and take over and he has no choice but to accept change. It's hard growning up...
12: We do live together well since I am a couch potato and usually lay in bed watching tv on my days off...I know i am exciting what can I say, but my job keeps me in fighter flight most of the time so I am just mentally drained as well as physically.
13: I am not complaining really just a little venting and a little lonely this week. I am so soft these days. What happen to the harded girl that could handle anything that was a wild horse and could not be in a commited relationship. Some of the poor guys I have dated. I just kept them so far away from me I think they thought I was like a man. No feelings just fun. However, these days I am hanging in there to couplehood because Engineer guy is such a good man...very handsome...smart.. and sexually chocolate...How can you beat that with a stick...
14: Well off to work tonight seems like i have been talked into working a 4pm to 12 am shift I am such a sucker...
15: I hope you all had a wonderful Mother's day all you mother's out there Rock on!!!
Engineer guy is out of town this week and seems like I haven't seen him in forever since last week I was out of town and this week he is in california working and visiting with his brother.
So, I am moving out of my roomates house and into his house...
Kind of weird for both of us:
1: I almost live with him anyway..
2: I have really never lived with a man except for when I was young dumb and married.
3: This is a really big step for him because I a crazy woman due to the very nature of my job.
4: I stick my finger many days were the sun doesn't shine...I mean really I never thought would be touching so many men's peni. I seemed fixated on this very subject I know but like a car accident I can't pull myself away from this very subject.
5: And let me tell you it is a shocker the first time you see old balls...One of the nurses the other day was asking me if it is normal for them to hang so low??
6: How should I know? I am not a guy and I wasn't about to ask one of the Dr. althought they might have thought it intertaining.
7: A fun fact for you all Men when they get older get grey pubs..Why I had no idea untill I was in nursing school...
8: I think I might be a little scarded seeing all the naked people that I have seen in my years as a Nurse.
9: Engineer guy without a fault still wants to have sex with me even after he knows that I have been touching another men's peni...I mean I don't make them cough or anything...okay only one time but I had good reason, and the poor guy just kept saying baseball think about baseball..
10: is that wrong??? Can I just say that the parasympathetic nervous system causes errections and apparently so do I...a compliment I think..
11: Engineer guy's best friend got engaged and moved out last week. It was heart breaking to see how hurt he was since they have lived together for so long. My poor baby is just a guys guy and like to hang with the guys alot. But darn it women come in and take over and he has no choice but to accept change. It's hard growning up...
12: We do live together well since I am a couch potato and usually lay in bed watching tv on my days off...I know i am exciting what can I say, but my job keeps me in fighter flight most of the time so I am just mentally drained as well as physically.
13: I am not complaining really just a little venting and a little lonely this week. I am so soft these days. What happen to the harded girl that could handle anything that was a wild horse and could not be in a commited relationship. Some of the poor guys I have dated. I just kept them so far away from me I think they thought I was like a man. No feelings just fun. However, these days I am hanging in there to couplehood because Engineer guy is such a good man...very handsome...smart.. and sexually chocolate...How can you beat that with a stick...
14: Well off to work tonight seems like i have been talked into working a 4pm to 12 am shift I am such a sucker...
15: I hope you all had a wonderful Mother's day all you mother's out there Rock on!!!
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Dancing is kind of primal.. drinking is a primal way to let go.. after that- I got nothin' except one more primal thing... Plant your bare feet into Mother Earth, dig in with your toes.. find your balance, and simply be who you are..
I suspect you may have saved some lives while working as an ER nurse.. save yourself first, others may need you later.. In the immortal words of Judah Ben-Hur on the Roman galley- "We exist to serve" "