Friday, May 19, 2006

Sh@# that Plagues My Mind

Okay So I love love my mini pin doggy..she is so happy to see me when I come home…I mean she smiles like the dog in “The Mask” and twirls her long tail around so fast I think that sometimes she is going to fly away when she sees me….So why in the world when she starts to try to make out with me does she have the most rancid breath I have ever smelled?? I’m telling you it smells like death…

Call me crazy I bought her a tooth brush, doggy tooth paste that is suppose to taste like meat…doggy breath strips…

I brushed her teeth while see looked at me like I was performing an ancient Chinese torcher and well…no relief…her breath still smells like death…Mini I love you darling but I don't think I can take you trying to make out with me anymore….

11 comments:

Just telling it like it is said...

disclaimer: this is strickly for my family...fam..I do not really make out with my dog..she is just a licker and likes to lick your face, hands, arms, even the air..so please do not call me and tell me how great Aunt Betty died an unusual death because she insisted on making out with her dog on a daily basis and the dog was found to have a rare bacteria in it's mouth that caused her sudden death...

Lestud said...

Imagine I once went out on a date with the girl I'm convinced was the one, with canine menstrual blood spots all over my shirt.

She thought it was some $50 artist edition print. Designers get away with everything on first dates hahaha..

(true story)

Way off topic, but since you are talking about how you love your dog and her disgusting traits..

Just telling it like it is said...

He should have been a designer...no I don't think even that would have saved him...P.S. It is really the bacteria in her mouth that farts and lets out a sulfa smell that is desgusting..not really her....she can't help it if she has hallotosis..

Q said...

Wait! Your aunt died like that too?? Ah poor Mini, you still love her. I used to work with this gur you always had the most rancid breath, now matter what he ate or if he had mints, it still smelled like dying rodents. Have you asked a vet what you can do? What do you feed poor Mini?

Just telling it like it is said...

Q it probably did not help that last week she got into the garbage and ate a whole pound of hamburger meat that had already gone bad in the fridge...I mean she is like 6 pounds...her tummy was so big I thought she was going to explode..no she has iron gut bacteria..like it just asked for more rancid meat...what can I say she was found..she always had to scrounge for food..still I was mad at her for like..a day..and poor great Aunt Betty...she just never saw it comming

Lestud said...

Just as soon I posted here yesterday... My little girl is leaving red spots all over the sofa... :(

Just telling it like it is said...

Don't they like have doggy pads for that or something?? Lestud your going to have to get control of that misshap...

Just telling it like it is said...

You can like only use the designer excuse for soooo long....

Q said...

She sounds cute, your dog I mean, not your dead aunt. Although Aunt Betty sounds like the kind of woman who I would like to meet after 15 shots of tequilla. And who doesn't eat raw rancid beef once in a while? How do you think I can afford to live in New York?

Just telling it like it is said...

ahhh my doggy is the cutest little fart ever...I mean how could I be mad at her for like more than a day..she did not eat for like 3days..so in the end she was really just trying to save me money..maybe that is why she had a rancid T-bonesteak in her mouth last night that she found in the trash cause she apprently thought I was low on cash...

Q said...

Aww, she even cares about your financial health. Who doesn't love a dog like that? Take her children killing breath as a sign of love. From now on she should only deserve the best raw rancid beef money can buy.