Dare I say it...

I was pondering the this fact the other day...

Other day: I pondered to myself...what is the sweetest thing a man has ever said to you??

HMMMMMMMM...dare I say it...I mean what will people in blog land think of me...and then and then...I was reading a favorite fellow bloggers blog and she said...some people some people hide behind their blog...as if to have this make-belief character...that is not at all who they are...and I said to myself...

Self...it is riska'...should you tell it...can we talk sex here...I mean if i can tell you all about my friends bamboo ass I guess I can tell you what is the sweetest thing a man ever told me....and I quote this is straight from his mouth...

I mean does it get any sweeter than this....
Last night was amazing.....I haven't had chemistry like that with somebody in a long time....or sex with somebody as beautiful as you ever. = ) I have to admit that I was shocked everything happened too but like you said we only live once.

and there you have it...ahhh the memories...I degress...I have to look fondly back at my life...

Go figure?....

These Are My Conversations..What's Wrong With Me...

Me: So wow that food I cooked was good but man my stomach is tore up...

Friend: my stomach is tore up too...I have like been in the bathroom ten times today..

Me: Really ar you okay?

Friend: Yes, I am fine but my ass feels like a bamboo butt...

Me: Really...a bamboo butt?? was it my dinner??

Friend: No it was the taco bell I ate today or maybe it was the 12 beers I had last night..

Me: Do you ahhhh have hemrroids??Do you need me to take a look at your butt??

Friend: No I do not have hemrroids and I do not need you to look at my bamboo butt hole??

Me: Why not? how do you know that you do not have hemrroids?? I might need to take a look...I mean I am a nurse...I see that sort of thing all the time...

Friend: I have had hemrroids before because one time one time I pushed to hard...and I felt them...

Me: Are you sure that you do not need me to look?? when did you have hemrriods...

Friend: No, you haven't see my bamboo butt before and your not looking at it...and I am sure that I do not have hemrroids...and I am not telling you when I had hemrroids...

Me: I'm sorry that your butt feels sore and like a bamboo butt...

Friend: thanks...I mean for caring about my sore bamboo butt...

What is sad people is that this kind of talk goes on all the time...I can't turn it off people...it never ends..I almost talked him into it thougth...I almost had him...

UMMMM Yeah So.....

So it has come to my attention that my family is not the only crazy and bizarre family around...

I mean...so yeah my family will pick your head until it is picked clean of zits...and they may drink a little to much and then go thought the Carls Jr. drive though at like 3:00 am in the morning and then say, "hey burrito guy"(me saying, there's no burrito guy here this a fast food burger joint sister) while she is swirling her underwear around her pointer finger....hey burrito guy...look at me underwear...ummmm...no there are no carne asda burritos here with guacamole and sour cream...

Okay so it has come to my attention that some families have weird ways of dealing with accidents…Picture this…17 male 2nd degree burns to the face, neck and arms…and what do they do…family puts egg…then get this…toothpaste…and then and then…they put mustard…mustard??? WTF Can you say ouch…seriously no seriously what were they thinking??? Don’t worry all…the doctor at first thought that he was at a hot dog stand when it somehow blew up and splashed mustard and mayo all over him…but then we kinda got the story...and oh yeah despite the side condiments he is fine…

Go figure?

What's Wrong With ME...

So, I got sucked in...I mean really sucked in...

I said I really do not think that I will like it...I only like the really deal...

I'm not sure I can handle the drama...and I think I see this kind of stuff all the time at work...

Yep...sucked in...you guessed it people I have been watching the videos of "NIP & TUCK"

Wow and I thought I had a crazy drama life...not anything like Christians...

Sex...drugs...rock-in-roll....could it get any better than this...

I degress...yes...i have turned to the TV to make my life exciting....or at least to get a glimps of someone having mind blowing sex....

So you think you can dance....

In my ever relently attempt to keep my butt from falling to the ground and dragging to the ground I attempt to make it to the gym several times a week...

and who do I see at my my gym...mister " I live to torcher you doctor guy"...so let me explain...

Single ER doctor that I love to torcher...who thinks I am completely an idoit...or at least he knows that I am realy really new since I handed him an ET tube backward and he like hit the respritory therapist(slap) with it...ohhhh my bad I claim...sorry this is my first intibation...yes I am an idiot.. Sure ahhh yeah I know what I am doing...

I feel bad for him...he says to me at the gym...so you go to this gym uhh?...OUCH...maybe he is saying...wow...not her again....

Quick...I act like I know what I am doing lifting the chest weights...yes...so I am really clumbsy do my job...but...ahhhh i can work out...are you impressed.??..I degress...I am afraid not he probably doesn't even care...
why me...really why me...
One day...you just wait one day....

Can you say...ummmmm Hard as a Rock

First I would like to tell you all that ummmm Dog the Bounty Hunter is my new crush...So you ask me what is it about Dog that you love?

I think it is his really long string dyed blond hair..or that fact that he feathers it up in the front where it like sticks out bigger than my bangs that I had in high school...

Or maybe it is all his kids...he has nine or that fact that he likes to hunt fugatives...or the tight leather pants or Big Big can of Mace....I not really sure what it is but he is my new facination....

So, can you say hard as a rock...okay this is not even right...so if your swimish do not read this part...but you know know that I love to gross everyone out...

Here is goes...ummmmm at what point do you seek out medical help...really do you like wait untill you arm falls off...or wait untill your whole leg is black and necrotic, oozing green stuff...smelling like something died in it and then say hey...maybe I should like get that looked at...

So...ever heard of Priprism......Ohhhh the priprism.....an errection that's right I said errection that last more than 4-6 hrs...

Well let's just say people if you have an errection that last for more than 4-6 hours due to the new drugs like Viagra or Cealis...Get help...I repeat get help...

Do not wait because if you do.... your Peni might fall off...that's right people I said it your Penis(penis, penis, penis...I love saying that) might fall off...

So, the other day someone had priprism...his errection started at 6:00 am and he did not seek help until 11:00 pm...I think he was told it might fall off...we had to drain it...that's right I said drain it...he looked like frankinstein..with two neelde inserted (i told you not everyone could handle this story) bilaterally at the base of Peni.....

and the moral to this story...do not wait untill your legs, arms, Penis...fall off to get help...it might just fall off if you don't....

MIA...can you say Missing in Action....

Okay so the past several weeks I have been trying to figure out the broken peices of my life...
I know I am emotional right now...It's PMS...there I said it...PMS

PMS aka for I have been really bitchy and emotional all at the same time...

How can this happen to me...darn...darnnnnn

So, anywho...whilst I try to figure out the broken peices of my life...I have been having some fun...in the sun...

but still have many things to work out...you guessed it..most of all of this has to do with "Mister Guy" who still has not stopped calling...

Am I destined to have this pain linger amounst my heart fer ever...

well...more later I must get ready for work...where at least all the crazies love me...

My Most